do i have aichmophobia

[Felix x0x]

Hello! Im new to this site, and my friends have been worried about me lately. They think i might be suicidal by the things i tell them, but i think i just have a fear of sharp objects. Sometimes, my dad will say "Felicia, hand me a sharp knife so i can cut this open" and so i will, but as im handing him the knife, i see this mental picture of me stabbing myself, and dying on the floor, drenched in blood. It only happens with knifes, every once in a while, maybe with a pair of sciccors (spelling?)...but the odd thing is, it never happens with a butter knife, only with a sharp knife that u could actually do something with...I dont want to die, i really dont, i want to live, even thought im terribly stressed out, i love my life, and want to stay here, and i cant help these mental pictures...can u please help me figure out if i'm suicidal or if i just have aichmophobia? Thanks
-Felicia
PS: my IM is Felix x0x if you want to talk, or help me

[Buby]

hi felicia,

scissors= correct spelling incase you're wondering.

im not sure you're suicidal, i just think you imagine these things from a past experience of a family memeber or yourself. Have you ever been in an acident that you were hurt in? or know anyone who was? how long have you had these images? Posting on this site is really helpful and you may find after a while you may stop these images. there is lots of advice and top tips you can do.

can i ask what aichmophobia is...is it what you say, imagining yourslf committing suicide?

anyway post back if you find anything out that you may have forgotten about your past, try hypnotherapy, that brings out things you dont remember. its really good. Can i ask how old you are? some of us are teenagers like me, but most are older, 20's 30's 40's. but if you ever need to talk you can email me. everyone on here are so friendly, they'll help you every way they can, including me.

keep posting, Hugs Rachel xxxx

[benoo5]

hi felicia,

this might help you...

www.hypnotictapes.com

they have a tape,specially written,for this problem,hope it helps...best wishes..bryan.

[Meg]

Hi Felicia

You're absolutely right. You do have an obsessional fear of sharp things and as with most fears we cannot stop thinking and visualizing the things we fear, so I have no doubt that you will never act on these thoughts and images and are not suicidal.

If someone is suicidal then the thoughts would bring them comfort rather than anxiousness or fear.

It's hard for others to understand so it might as well to keep this particular strain of thoughts to people who may understand, just as most of us figure out it's not worth telling people we 'hear' extra voices in our heads when we really mean our own thought and internal chatter processes.

Incidentally I locked all my knives in the attic when I was acute as I got so scared of my obsession with them.

It dawned on me after that time that it was hard to cook without them and if I was suicidal other ways would have occurred to me, or I could have just gone to get them as I'd put them there myself.. I was more afraid of becomeing amnesic and doing something awful whilst not myself..

They reappeared in a short while and each time I picked one up for months after I smiled and congratulated myself on being so much better then those days.

Keep in touch - it will pass.



Meg

Watch your thoughts, they become your words...
Watch your words, they become your actions... Watch your actions, they become your habits... Watch your habits, they become your character... Watch your character, it becomes your destiny...

[benoo5]

great post meg....bryan.

[Rennie1989]

Usually to over come a fear i gradually go near em. Start touching it and using it now and then. I did that with a spider but i passes out, dont do the same

Hope this will help ya

Jade

Post back

[stimpy]

I have the same thing.
But my fear of them comes from the violent relationship I used to be in.
I tell myself that as long as I am careful and watch what I am doing, there is no problem.
The problem is when someone else holds the knife and I have no control over their actions.

I find "Would you please stop waving that knife about, your freaking me out" helps a great deal.


Love, light and Best wishes
Liz xxx

[] Panic Monster & Scatty Eccentric

[Beli]

Hi,

It sounds very much to me like you have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. Obsessive compulsive disorder can involve you having unwanted violent thoughts, images and impulses. The images of stabbing yourself are so disturbing to you because it is so against what you believe. Obsessions are very distressing, as they are always about something that we fear the most. I myself have suffered with OCD for many years, and have had similar thought patterns. Just remeber that no matter what horrible thoughts you have, you will never actually act on them. A really excellent website that you should check out is www.ocduk.org It is a website all about obsessive compulsive disorder and has a message board with many people with exactly the same obsessions as you. I hope this helps

Let us know how u get on

Beli xxx

[nomorepanic]

Thanks for the link Beli - have added it to my links page on the website

Nicola

[Laurie28]

hiya,

When my anxiety 'peaked' I was terrible with sharp things I was petrified i would go 'insane' and hurt myself or other (even though I haven't a violent bone in my body) it went away when i began relaxing but it is hellish.

it was just my mind going into overdrive and I was scared of everything and the what if's were incredible.

Try and relax and hopefully this fear should go

lucky