Citalopram isn't helping me at all...

[Gaz1981]

I've been on Citalopram for almost 4 weeks now and I don't feel any different. Infact in some regards, I feel worse. I now have even less motivation than I did before I went on them and I don't feel as strong emotionally as I did before going on them. I dunno if that had to do with me having such a tight grip on everything before going on them.

The thing I don't understand is this though. Years ago I was suffering from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and was prescribed Citalopram and they worked wonders for me. This time however I wasn't really suffering from depression in the medical sense. My life is in a huge mess so I have what I would call "circumstantial depression" and theres no amount of medication in the world that would make me feel cheery about things right now. I accept that. The thing that eventually motivated me to go on Citalopram wasn't my mood, it was the fact that I was mentally exhausted from worrying all the time.

I suppose my question is. Is it possible that I'm on the wrong medication, even though it helped me last time? After 4 weeks of being on the medication, I thought I would have felt some sort of improvement. Theres none though, I'm still as anxious as ever and I need a blowtorch to get me out of bed in the morning, because I can't face the day.

[Logan_Five]

Gaz - you have to give it another 4 weeks, my friend as it can take 6-8 weeks until it enters the bloodstream properly. Like you, I have been on it before too (and it worked) though this time, it's taking a little bit longer. Hang on in there for another month, then see your GP unless you can't stand the side-effects or it makes you ill.

[Budgie]

Hi Gaz

You're doing really well with taking the cit, I know its not much help, but hangin in there for a few more weeks, as it can take some time before it starts to show

It sounds really weird, but feeling worse when beginning to take them is a sign that they are beginning to get into your body

[Gaz1981]

I know they're getting into my body, I have the side effects to prove it. I just don't see any improvement in my mood or overall frame of mind yet. I'm a bit worried though, I actually have a situation in 2 weeks to deal with that could be very bad if I don't start seeing the results I'm after soon.

I used to have Agoraphobia- It was a side effect of a prolonged illness I got which eventually led to depression. I did however overcome it and was able to go anywhere I wanted. I did feel discomfort in doing it, but I had developed coping techniques to overcome it, so I was effectively cured. After a lot of problems with my "girlfriend" who lives in America and who I have a daughter with, I suffered an agoraphobic relapse and a full mental melt down thanks to how she treated me.

Even though I was suffering from the effects of a breakdown and agoraphobia, I still forced myself to fly out to the States to see my little girl and to try to resolve things with my girlfriend. Unfortunately, by the time I got there I was mentally exhausted and I was that way the whole time I was there. I couldn't eat, I couldn't sleep. When I did eventually doze off, I would wake up drenched from head to toe in cold sweat. I was balancing on the edge of a massive panic attack the whole time I was gone.

I came back here with the intention of going on Citalopram again, so I was better able to function in stressful situations like that. I have a flight booked to fly out to the States in 13 days and I really don't feel up to it at all. I feel less able to travel than I did, because mentally I don't feel as strong as I did. So I really, REALLY hope they start working for me soon, otherwise I'm gonna be in all sorts of trouble when I'm in America.

[waterfall]

hi Gaz, like you i felt no improvements as such after 4 weeks [ i was first prescribed 20mg in sept for my first diagnosis of depression at 34....still finding it hard to accept that in itself!!]
i stayed on 20mg for 2months at least before it increased to 30mg for another 8wks or so. Currently on 40mg and i suppose i have 'stablisied' at this juncture....
i was wondering if the flying may have anything to do with your difficult time? its just that i would suffer severely if i knew i had to get on a plane [which is happening at easter, and already dreading it!].....best wishes Dx

[Gaz1981]

Yeah, I had considered that, but I don't think that's the issue. I do feel a bit of anxiety about the journey, but nothing major. When I went out last time, I actually overcame my fear of planes and being in America by exposing myself to it. The downside was as I said before, it left me mentally exhausted, pretty much because my brain had rewritten so many perceptions in such a short period of time. By the time I came home though, I felt no anxiety about planes whatsoever and I felt no anxiety about going back to America. I actually felt pretty confident about it, because I had managed to do it once.

The Citalopram was actually a precaution, just incase I didn't feel as ok with being there as I hoped. I figured it was a better idea to be in a position where I'm not so over emotional and I can think clearer. Because I've been so stressed out lately, I haven't been able to think clearly at all, and therefore was unable to work myself into a mindset where I felt like I would be able to visit the States.

Now though, I don't feel as strong as I did emotionally and its because of the Citalopram. Before if I had a panic attack, I had a good grip on being able to control it. Now I don't feel like that at all. No doubt because my Serotonin levels are all over the place, but I'm really hoping they stablise before my trip. I can't be dealing with side effects of anti depressants and wrestling with agoraphobia, whilst trying desperately to keep my family, because I'm inches away from losing them forever. It's just too much to deal with all at once.

[Gaz1981]

That's another week on Citalopram and still no improvement. I've still no energy, still no motivation, mood is still really low and I'm every bit as anxious as I ever was. I leave the for states in 6 days time. I am in so much f*cking trouble :/

[pheetuz]

Sounds really tough mate, dont know what to say other than hopefully seeing your daughter will lift your spirits. Might be worth talking to your GP to get some diazepam or some thing to that effect to help you deal with the panic / anxiety, know they really help me out when im in a fix.

Really hope your mood lifts before you go away

/Pete

[Gaz1981]

Thanks for the kind wishes mate. I actually have some Diazepam around here somewhere that I got for the journey last time, but I didn't ever take them. I've never been one to tranquilize myself. I tend to wrestle with the effects instead of relaxing. Usually ends up stressing me out more.

My biggest concern right now is the fatigue and fogginess I feel. I know when I'm gone I'm going to be wrestling with agoraphobic issues. Those are going to be much harder to control if my mind is exhausted, which is why I started in Citalopram. To get that sensation out of the way so I can just focus on what needs to be done and more importantly, being able to actually relax and enjoy the limited time with my daughter, instead of being a nervous wreck like I was last time. It was very hard to not constantly be upset knowing I had to leave her. It's a very powerful emotion to feel on top of panic. It feels like you have the 2 strongest emotions a person can possibly feel, pulling you in two different directions.

I had really hoped I would have numbed some of that off by now so I'm better able to function.

[Corinne]

Ativan is the only thing that gets rid of my panic attacks. I don't believe it's as strong as Valium (Diazapam).

Other than that, I want to say that I hope your visit is wonderful and you resolve your family issues to your satisfaction.

Also, I want to wish you welcome when you arrive in America!