Christmas

[Caramel]

Well, it's here again!

Yet again, I'm finding myself getting edgy already (actually, that started ages ago!)

I'm getting wound up about having to go to relatives - go to my mum's on Xmas Day (not so bad), then boyfriend's Mum's on Boxing Day (MUCH worse! - Loads of people, eating, overbearing mum etc etc).

But the worse thing is New Year's Eve - obviously I want my other half to have a great time, but I am suffering more and more with agoraphobia due to very severe panic attacks, and find social situations particularly difficult.

My boyfriend doesn't drive, and when I get really bad, I really shouldn't be driving. Of course, I don't want to have to rely on anyone else because I want to be able to escape if I have to. AGHHHH!!![V]

Last year was really awful, and I ended up at home alone on Boxing Day while my boyfriend went to see his mum, then we spent New Year's Eve at home.

I'm exhausted already, and it hasn't even started yet![^]

[nicki]

HI
I had a panic attack at my Church's Carol service on Sunday.
I am usually the LIFE & SOUL of the party, but the last few weeks because of my anxiety I would rather stay at home, where I know I'm safe.
I don't know what the answer is, if anyone does, please reply.

Nicki

PS Have a good Christmas x

[MikeyT]

I can totally relate to what you are saying - since Saturday my anxiety has increased, especially in the mornings, I think this is anticipation anxiety with regards to Christmas.
I have suffered with anxiety for a number of years and had had a good 18 months relatively anxiety free up to last Christmas- during that 18 month period I also became self-employed.
Anyway last Christmas day - big panic attack that morning, then felt very anxious for several days after, to the point I went to my GP's, who prescribed beta blockers.
I have had anxiety ups and downs throughout the year and have put work into to try and minimise things. but like us all I don't want any anxiety feelings at all no matter how mild.
This year my sitution is different, things at home were very tense last year and I had a lot of stress with the amount to work I was doing, the fact that I became ill upset my partner, where she was very angry with me.
This year circumstances are different, my partner is being supportive, giving me encouragement to try and not let it get on top of me, she asked me today what is different to this weekend, to last weekend, when I was fine?
She also asked if I was excited for our children, which I honestly said I know they will have a really nice time, but these thoughts of anxiety cloud this for me in a big way.
This year I also have a lot less work on. We have finished our shopping and kept to a budget.
I think for me because the memory of last year, I expect to be anxious, so therefore I am. We are not doing anything outlandish on the day, visiting my dad, my sister and then onto my partners mum's for lunch, with her brother (who is also having probs at the moment) and his family.
I have been using for a few months now Megs CD set for the breathing excerises and have changed my work ethic - ie work less, try and spend more time with my family etc, regular excercise, healthy diet, even though I have lost two stone, stop drinking and found a good GP, so I am on 10mg or Cipralex a day.
For me all I want for Christmas is to be anxiety free.

[Meg]

The expectations on us at Christmas are stifling.

To be places that we don't really want to go at all for a certain time often with long journeys after alcohol fuelled evenings.

To be happy and jolly when inside you just want to curl up in a heap and long for familiarity

Wanting some peace and quiet instead of constant stimulation.

Everyone asking if they can help and thus getting to see what really goes on in any household when the pressure to perform perfectly is on.

Couple all that with a few poignant memories or what if's or I should have's, shaken up with a tad of unresolved guilt and a stir of resentment and a powdering of longing for absent loved ones and it is a recipe for anxiety.

Try to minimize the musts, maximise the 'I'd like to' and keep it all in perspective as much as possible and pace yourself throughout.

Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com

Your anxiety is the human representation of the pictures that you paint using your many vivid colours of revolving and reoccurring thoughts.
How big is your gallery ?

[Caramel]

Thanx Guys,

I know everyone here is feeling the same, let's hope we can all have a better one this year.

Emxxx

[feege]

thanks everyone for your comments - it helped so much to hear other people feel the same and Meg you summed it up SO well!!

I have additional stress this year with my daughter in law who has lymphoma and my son is really struggling. Unfortunately that puts pressure on me to be 'ok' so I do not cause them any additional stress....

But to be honest I always feel pretty lousy at xmas so it probably isn't making that much difference!

Ho ho ho - it will all be over this time next week (well aparty from NYE.....)

fee
xx

[Piglet]

Yes I would agree with you all - my anxiety levels have risen too during December.

I am going to take my own advice here and just live in the day I am in - guys if we are all trying then we are succeeding on at least one level.

Merry Christmas

Love Piglet xx

"Supposing a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?" said Piglet.
"Supposing it didn't," said Pooh after careful thought.