Gonna keep a record here of my citalopram journey!

[martbarr]

Hmmm took no sleep aids last night and was awake at 4am tossing and turning feeling very anxious until day break. Feels like my brain isn't woring properly - you know can't concentrate!

I had tuna for my tea last night and am starting to really worry that fish affects me in a negative way - the evidence is slowly building that way.
Fish oils for sure send me very fuzzy, introverted and anxious, as does flax oil. So where can I get some omega-3 that doesn't affect me!
Hm -odd the things we worry about isn't it?

Am going out for a few hours wirh Mrs B to try to get some sunshine and look at local shops probably. Will see if that perks me up as I feel very wound up and fuzzy brained at the moment.

Oh well not even a fortnight yet - so will hang in and try to kep smiling.

Cheers
Martin

[Maj]

Hello Martin,

It's just a pity that antidepressants seem to make people feel worse before they feel better, isn't it?
As I said before, you have a good attitude so it looks like no matter what you feel like you'll just carry on.
Yes, I think getting out in the sun will help you. There is nothing like getting out in the fresh air - it always works for me. It helps with sleep too.
I hope you get a better sleep tonight and that you start feeling better soon. It won't be for the want of trying.
Myra

[moks]

Hi Martin, I am on Day 2 of taking CIT and I'm glad you're posting a day to day here, made me decide to do the same thing. Gets me on here everyday, so Im always getting support and I think it's healthy to chronicle it! So, thanks for letting yourself be 'out there' for us all! Cheers!

[martbarr]

hey moks

Cool, and thanks for the support.
Please let us know how you get on.


Cheers
Martin

[martbarr]

Morning peeps,

All up and raring to go today?
Only asking 'cos I'm not !

Anyway - whatever you're doing today I hope it's a great day for you all.

I tool a Nytol last night and slept quite deeply,
but struggling to wake this morning.
Got to go to play the keyboard in church this morning so need to snap out of sleep soon!

Looking forward to an afternoon in front of the fire with not that much to do.

Feel not a lot different - I don't think so anyway - that horrible anxiety of yesterday seems to be not as bad - like I said not awake fully yet.
Good job the car knows it's own way to church this morning!

Any major updates will post later - otherwise more tomorrow.

good luck
Martin

[AJS]

Hi Martin
your 2 weeks down already - stick with it - it does get better. I'm almost finished my 8th week.
my first 2 weeks were not good (side effects, sore heads, dizzy, lots of panic attacks), second 2 weeks a little better (but still having anxiety and panic attacks), third 2 weeks - no panic attacks, still had anxiety and very tired.
The past 2 weeks have been much better and I can now look back and say it's been worth sticking to it. Last sat night I even managed to go out for a meal with my partner and another couple and had a great night, went out with my colleagues on Friday there and also had a good night - I am still too scared to drink - but I am so pleased that I was able to enjoy my nights out without wanting to run away constantly!!
I am still having some anxiety on some days (not every day) but it is now at the stage that I can take a beta blocker and just get on with my day - i've now been back at work on a phased return for 3 weeks.
I have gone from not being able to sleep, eat or get out of bed to being back at work and being able to cope in 8 weeks and citalopram has been the main thing helping.
I have also used relaxation tapes, cut out all stimulants (caffine, nicotine,msg etc) been seeing a counsellor, started exorcise, read self help books.
There are good and bad days and it takes courage to keep going - but things will get better!
A

[martbarr]

Hi Martin
your 2 weeks down already - stick with it - it does get better. I'm almost finished my 8th week.
my first 2 weeks were not good (side effects, sore heads, dizzy, lots of panic attacks), second 2 weeks a little better (but still having anxiety and panic attacks), third 2 weeks - no panic attacks, still had anxiety and very tired.
The past 2 weeks have been much better and I can now look back and say it's been worth sticking to it. Last sat night I even managed to go out for a meal with my partner and another couple and had a great night, went out with my colleagues on Friday there and also had a good night - I am still too scared to drink - but I am so pleased that I was able to enjoy my nights out without wanting to run away constantly!!
I am still having some anxiety on some days (not every day) but it is now at the stage that I can take a beta blocker and just get on with my day - i've now been back at work on a phased return for 3 weeks.
I have gone from not being able to sleep, eat or get out of bed to being back at work and being able to cope in 8 weeks and citalopram has been the main thing helping.
I have also used relaxation tapes, cut out all stimulants (caffine, nicotine,msg etc) been seeing a counsellor, started exorcise, read self help books.
There are good and bad days and it takes courage to keep going - but things will get better!
A

Fantastic - that's great encouragement - thanks very much.
I need to tame the sleep thing really, as I figure good sleep is crucial to getting better.

So - yep - looking forward to feeling better............

more anon
Mart

[AJS]

for sleeping - have a nice hot bath with lavender soak or something similar, then get some sleep spray/pillow mist, lie in bed and listen to a relaxation cd.
My counsellor gave me a relaxation cd - and i thought "this won't help me sleep" - i had no faith in these sort of things (went to a hypnostist years ago to help with fear of flying and it was useless) - but was willing to give anything a shot - low and behold i think I have only ever heard the end of the cd 3 times - i am usually fast asleep half way through!
I wake up nearly every night at 2.30 then 4.30 - but just spray my pillow mist and go back to sleep - or on worse nights put my cd back on again - the deep breathing helps as well
Also try going out for a brisk 20 min walk at night - you will burn some adrenalin off , the fresh air will help you sleep and you will give yourself good endorphins.
Give these things a go - it might not work as everyone is different - but anything is worth a shot.
Also try not to take too many other remedies - I read you were taking nytol and kalms - I was using kalms, quite life, valarian and actually found that these were stopping me sleeping after using them for too long.

[martbarr]

for sleeping - have a nice hot bath with lavender soak or something similar, then get some sleep spray/pillow mist, lie in bed and listen to a relaxation cd.
My counsellor gave me a relaxation cd - and i thought "this won't help me sleep" - i had no faith in these sort of things (went to a hypnostist years ago to help with fear of flying and it was useless) - but was willing to give anything a shot - low and behold i think I have only ever heard the end of the cd 3 times - i am usually fast asleep half way through!
I wake up nearly every night at 2.30 then 4.30 - but just spray my pillow mist and go back to sleep - or on worse nights put my cd back on again - the deep breathing helps as well
Also try going out for a brisk 20 min walk at night - you will burn some adrenalin off , the fresh air will help you sleep and you will give yourself good endorphins.
Give these things a go - it might not work as everyone is different - but anything is worth a shot.
Also try not to take too many other remedies - I read you were taking nytol and kalms - I was using kalms, quite life, valarian and actually found that these were stopping me sleeping after using them for too long.

Great email A
Thanks for the ideas.
Yes am worried about getting hooked on sleep aids - but never take the same thing two nights running. I read here that most folks sleep seemed to improve around 2 weeks in, so here's hoping!

Can I be really cheeky and ask where I could get a cd like yours - is it something I could go and buy or was it made specially for you?
Thanks again
Mart

[martbarr]

Hi

Phew - have been so washed out and tired yesterday and today.
I think I slept better - had a weird dream about losing my car (although it was a different model - it had my plates) at a holiday resort I can't identify and awoke still not having found it - odd feeling like I have unfinished business - but there ya ago!
I think it was most likely that I wanted a wee and couldn't be bothered to get up!


Feel like I haven't fully woken up again - my wife reckons I seem less stressed than usual which can't be bad, although I feel a bit like a zombie!
Am at work, thankfully with not that much to do.

Have a good one everybody.

cheers
Mart