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  1. #11
    Join Date
    Dec 2008

    Re: Avoiding the slightest thing/things I used to enjoy...

    Hi Sal, as you can see from the many replies to your message, that lots of people experience similar anxieties about things, especially when they are related to past distressing times, so we understand and support you.
    I do agree that we shouldn't let these take over us, though it is not always easy at first to confront these worries. I have faced up to some things and feel stronger for that, however I must confess I'm still not good with going on buses or public transport generally, from some harrassment I suffered in the past from a group of yobs.
    I keep telling myself that I can't let a few ars-holes interfere with my life and it annoys the sh-t out of me that I still do a bit, so I know how hard facing up is, but we are all valuable and worthwhile human beings who deserve to feel secure and content, so we must face up to whatever is in the way of us feeling secure and content.
    Step by step,day by day, stronger and stronger, Stephen

  2. #12
    Join Date
    Jan 2010

    Re: Avoiding the slightest thing/things I used to enjoy...

    Thanks so much guys for the support, it's really made me feel better.

    I just feel terrible that so many of us are avoiding the things we love because of this stupid illness, we can't we just "turn it off" or something, it's our own brains, why can't we control them, it's so frustrating :(

    I know I probably will do all that stuff again, it's just a case of when & how much longer I have to keep going through this :(

    I have my first appointment with my therapist tomorrow, I'm so scared about it & it also means I have to go into town, for the first time in god knows how long...tomorrow is gonna be VERY trying
    'Just decide what you want & then make it happen'

    'You can never win or lose, if you don't run the race'

  3. #13
    Join Date
    Oct 2009

    Re: Avoiding the slightest thing/things I used to enjoy...

    Hi Sal

    yes me too, from the simple things that others take for granted.. I know we should face them head on and I try but when it makes me feel uneasy I find that safety zone of avoidance again.

    Thing is we are punishing ourselves but you are not the only one... why don't you try these things gradually... knowing that you can turn the tv off or walk away, same with ipod.. possibly confide in someone who can be there should you need them...but I don't think you will... it is us preventing ourselves..

    It is easier no denying but everyone is right though it stops that panicky feeling it does make us miserable arghhhh lol ...hugs sent

  4. #14

    Re: Avoiding the slightest thing/things I used to enjoy...

    Big hugs!

    Since finding this forum a few days ago I feel a million times better just from realising i'm not alone with all my worries!

    Just like you, I avoid everything that might raise my heartbeat. And unfortunately this also means avoiding something my hubby would probably rather do more of... So that causes quite a few problems.

    Dying my hair - aaahhh I am so pleased this has been mentioned!!!!! I have dyed my hair for years, but recently i've started to panic when i'm doing it!

    If I see one of those god damn blood vans I avoid that road for days and days and days!!!!! I can't walk through the blood clinic bit at work either, I have to walk the very long way round.

    I avoid holidays, going anywhere I dont think is safe or doesn't have a clean toilet nearby, any kind of social gathering, and lots more...

    I really do try and face up to some of them though, like I recently went to Ireland for a week, it was bloomin' stressful but I had a good time

  5. #15
    Join Date
    Jan 2010

    Re: Avoiding the slightest thing/things I used to enjoy...

    I know how you feel.. This week I've started doing something everyday that I usually avoid. I go for short walks (20 mins), and everyday I push myself even more. My biggest fear is fainting, but I have found something that helps me while walking. When I feel ill, weak, faint I just tell myself- "trust yourself, even if you faint you'll get back on your feet and keep walking!You're strong!". And you know what that works! I have fainted in the past but it was never a big issue. I drank more water and made sure I had something to eat before I went out.
    Now I always make sure I drink enough water just in case.. But it's what I say to myself that helps. I even try to imagine funny things happening to me. That takes the negative thoughts away.

    Hope you'll get better!

  6. #16
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    , , United Kingdom.

    Re: Avoiding the slightest thing/things I used to enjoy...


    I cant beleive a few of us are like this with hair dye.

    Iv been dying my hair for years and years and i really want to do it again but for some reason now i think if i dye it, i will have an allergic reaction and die.

    I also remember having a panic attack while i was eating a certain food, so i wont eat it anymore incase it brings on an attack

    love mandie x

  7. #17
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    , , Australia.

    Re: Avoiding the slightest thing/things I used to enjoy...


    i too am like this, although i used to be much much worse then i am now.

    i got to become agoraphoic for a few months and realised i needed to tackle it before it became harder to deal with. so i started my hubby to walk around the block with me nd our dogs...sometimes id cry and run back, but i did get better over time. ive since had a full time job for 2 years and completed 3 yrs a uni

    i still refuse to catch a train, but i can do a bus. i refuse to go in a lift above 3rd floor (i take the stairs) i wont stay in hotels. but i can now dye my hair (totally understood that one) i can drive for hours from home. i can cope (most of the time) in shopping centres. i havent made the cinemas yet, its been..gosh, i dont remember, the last one i saw was lord of the rings- the first one..lolol....i can watch scary movies now, but it must be in the day...

    you can overcome these problems, but i feel you need to do it one at a time and when your ready. i forced myself up to the shopping centre every day for like a year, it was hard and i would stay as long as i could cope.
    perhaps with the hair dye, try a strip first and see how that goes, if its too much you can wash it out, or choose a spot under you hair so you can cut it..if you have too...

    good luck and your def not alone here

  8. #18
    Join Date
    Mar 2020

    Re: Avoiding the slightest thing/things I used to enjoy...

    Please excuse me for bumping a ten year-old thread.

    Many of the things expressed here I can relate to, as I suffered from very bad anxiety between the ages of 14 and 17 (particularly due to emetophobia, the fear of vomiting) and hated being in certain environments, especially those that were enclosed without windows and having shiny surfaces.

    I reckon the shower anxiety thing must stem from the scene in the classic horror film 'Psycho'. Remember it is only 'drama' and completely fictitious.

    It does seem as though we have been conditioned into perceiving every slightest hazard lurking within pretty much every corner, nook and cranny of our everyday environments, probably exacerbated by the media constantly intruding into our lives 24/7, thus provoking an epidemic of 'hypervigilance' within contemporary society, even though many of the things we fear today have probably always been there to a certain extent.

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