Re: Travelling Phobia
Hi Jellie
I know how it feels - I'm useless at travelling. I stopped getting on buses years ago, and travelling as a passenger in a car. And going on boats. I take valium for planes. And now, I even struggle driving myself places and have started getting anxious on trains. I wish I knew of a way to help, all I can do is tell you what I did earlier this month...
I got on a train to Gatwick airport (3 hours) for a flight to Tunisia. Unfortunately, Gatwick can't cope with snow so things didn't go according to plan! We were supposed to fly out at 7 in the morning - at 2 in the afternoon I heard my partner's and my names called out to get outside where a BUS was waiting to take us to Stansted. OMG. I completely broke down and refused to go get on the bus. The thing is, if I didn't get on it I would be stuck at Gatwick indefinitely - no way of getting back home. I took a valium, got on the bus and cried for the hour and a half it took to get there. I got on the plane. I got on another bus at the other end for 40 minutes to get to the hotel. And nothing bad happened. I was fine. Getting home wasn't straightforward either, we ended up having to get a taxi back to the airport because the bus didn't pick us up. And I managed to get through that, too.
I don't know how I did it, all I can say is this - I challenged myself more than I ever have before AND I WAS FINE. I don't know what possessed me to book that holiday in the first place, I was sure I'd never get there anyway. I was ill for a week before we went. I suppose I just reached my absolute limit with it all and gave in. And I say it again - I was fine. That's not to say that I have any plans to do it again
I don't know if sharing this will help, I think I just wanted to show you that somewhere, deep down, we DO have the guts to argue with ourselves. We DO have the strength within us to challenge our fears, even if only for a little while. Small steps.
I have severe emetophobia, which I think is the root cause of ALL my anxiety and panic attacks. I've been this way for more years than I want to think about, and I've never before pushed myself so far. I ended up completely numb to it all. But there's a tiny ray of hope now - I put myself through all that and came out the other side.
I hope everyone who suffers like this will believe me when I say this - when you get right down to it, right in the middle of your worst nightmare, you will get through it. Because that day at Gatwick was MY worst nightmare.
Don't give up hope
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Knowing it's irrational doesn't change anything...