Feel bad asking...

[alias_kev]

Hi Guys, I just came in here to ask for a big virtual hug and seen that the forums already had a big dose of sadness. So I feel bad posting but I kind of still need some kind thoughts....

I haven't posted much the last many months as I'd been no worse and no better with my anxiety, and a kind member here had the time to support me via PM & email. I'd been thinking of getting different meds to see if it would beat the anxiety a bit more and plan(ned) to spend the voucher I won in the raffle on some CBT type books to help myself that way.

Anyway other than not improving life was going OK in early January....

Then my son stopped going to college - I think its depression/lonelyness far more than just laziness, maybe even a touch of SAD. Quite sad for him and worrying as its hard to make up an education later. Also if he stops going the government take away all those things like tax credits and we hit the buffers financially. Haven't yet managed to get him to go to the Drs! He's very withdrawn even for a teenager....

Then last week my elderly mother took a turn for the worst. She suffers from acute alzheimers anyway but after a gastric upset last friday she has not eaten and has only drunk a little - literally syringed into her mouth. A couple of days she showed some consciousness but now she seems completely out. So we're kind of just waiting....

My sister looks after her most of the time, but I've just taken over for the next few days (as I often do)... Its calm enough, but a little bit freeky.

Anyway - if anyone has any kind thoughts I'd be glad to read them.

[bottleblond]

Awwww Kev of course you can have a hug and there is no need to feel bad for asking...




I really do hope things start to improve for you soon.
Lisa
xxxx

[suzy-sue]

For you Kev Hope things ,get better with your Son and your Mum doesnt suffer ..Take care hun we always here if you need to talk ..Luv Sue xx

[RosieXXX]

Hello Kev,

Don't feel bad for asking, we all need a hug sometimes
and just knowing there is someone there to listen helps too.

[eeyorelover]

Oh Kevin you can always ask for support here!
Don't ever feel bad about it either!!
((((((HUGS))))))
xxx
Sandy

[alias_kev]

Thanks everyone - its nice to have people to think about me/us. We've always done really badly for long running friendships, so its all pretty lonely as well as bad.

Sitting with mum as I type. She's very heavily asleep. Its going to a weird few days. With her alzheimers its hard to know if this is awful or a graceful exit while she still had a few percent of "quality of life" left. (It was down to only a few percent - no conscious recognition of anyone, no mobility and just about able to use a spoon, although she did still enjoy singing a song. Like she was 18 months to 3 years old in many ways, although she mainly reckoned she was 14-21 years old if asked! Its been a weird year. )

[claire m]

have some hugs from me too.

[weeble40]

hey Kev as the mother of 3 teenagers, I can totally understand what your going through, bringing up children is hard work even when your not anx, theres never an easy answer with kids, try coaxing him along to the docs, maybe just ask to see the nurse for bit of a health check up, does he eat well plenty fruit and veg etc, I always find kids tend to operate better, when they got healthy food intake, but that is just my opioin, Ive even took to smuggling veg into food so mine dont notice lol, I work in a care home for the elderly, and know how heartbreaking, the older generation illnesses make the family feel, dont ever feel bad coming and asking for a hug, were always here to help, I hope your all feeling much better soon, keep your chin up and have a hug from me,

Take care Emms xxx

[Astarian]

(((huggles))) and lots of loving thoughts

[alias_kev]

Thanks again everyone. I think that's the most hugs I've ever had! Its been a tough week, I got the Dr to switch my meds to try and let me cope with my son's problems better and then mum went ill within 24 hours! Although my sister's coped with it alone all this week it was another big depressive pressure. I spent most of the week sitting on/in bed and not trying to deal with anything, and that's even worse than I usually am. "Dealing with stuff" is my big fear/problem, I feel MUCH safer not doing rather than doing. Oddly (?) though I remain good in an actual realtime crisis, like I always have been.

Thanks for all your kind thoughts. I'll pop back as I need to over the weekend if that's ok.

Some good news already my son did get to the Drs tonight - a major breakthrough - and has a backdated certificate, and some sleeping tablets in the hope that his very broken sleep habits are a big part of his problems. He's been offered some A/D's if those don't help. His sister was a big help in this today so sometimes it really helps to get other teens to take the lead in supporting their siblings. I think it worked because you don't have all the normal teenage-parent angst on top of the other problems.