The highly sensitive person

[verity]

I read a book called the highly senitive person by Elaine n Aaron. It talks about a trait that makes the person process all stimuli more deeply than most. This leads to over thinking, great empathy and the tendency to become more easily overwhelmed. It describes me well! I'm wondering if anyone else has heard of this?

[Maj]

I haven't heard of this book but I do believe that I must have been born with this trait because I have always been highly sensitive. I don't remember a time when I was ever anything different. I think we are born with personalities like this and sometimes life events can make you even more sensitive. It's learning to live with it comfortably that is the key, which isn't easy at times.
Myra

[wiskersonkittens]

I have read it, too, because I am an HSP. Very informative -- it even mentioned we are more prone to hypochondria because we feel every sensation in our bodies! Being like that is a double edged sword -- I feel we need more sensitive people in the world, but I wish I could be sensitive and not feel every little knick and ding in my body! I wish I could be one of those that doesn't. I am an observer in this world more than a participator (er?) and when I am having anxiety I scan the people around me and envy them because I imagine they are at peace and wish I could be like them. Maybe they are good actors like me. Anyway, it was a good book that helped me understand myself better -- even though I wish it offered a cure to some of the things that it causes us to feel.

[verity]

Hello fellow HSP, yes I often envy others and think that they cope so much better than me. I feel every sensation in my body too, and hear every sound, smell all smells and feel others emotions. I to wished it offered a cure, but it seems like we have to learn to manage our sensitivity and focus on the positives it brings. Its hard though cos sometimes you just want a break! I try to build in as much rest time as I can throughout the day, even it is just a tea break or a snuggle on the sofa for a bit.

[KK77]

I think we are born with personalities like this and sometimes life events can make you even more sensitive. It's learning to live with it comfortably that is the key, which isn't easy at times.

This is a very true statement Myra. I do think certain people are born with this - perhaps inheriting it from one of their parents. The upside is that it can give you a sense of empathy which "insensitive" or thicker-skinned people haven't got. These people can always sympathise but empathy is something different - it's not just a sense of pity. I think the downside, however, is that sensitive people tend to become overwhelmed very easily by life events, which leads to your second point of conditioning playing a part too. Therefore they are probably also more prone to anxiety and depression. And you're dead right: learning to live with it is the key because you cannot fight something that is such an innate part of your being.

yes I often envy others and think that they cope so much better than me. I feel every sensation in my body too, and hear every sound, smell all smells and feel others emotions. I to wished it offered a cure, but it seems like we have to learn to manage our sensitivity and focus on the positives it brings. Its hard though cos sometimes you just want a break! I try to build in as much rest time as I can throughout the day, even it is just a tea break or a snuggle on the sofa for a bit.

I think the physical side of being sensitive is another problem. Everything seems overwhelming and too much, which inevitably leads to exhaustion. I think we definitely need to pace ourselves and know when to give ourselves a rest. Otherwise the vicious circle between body and mind takes over.

In conclusion, I think acceptance is key but management is also vital.