NMP Complaints Mismanagement Controller
Queues!
Why is it that when you see a queue up ahead and mentally assume your position in it (ie, last), that someone from seemingly nowhere jumps out in front of you and beats you to it! You are still last, but now with an extra queue-jumping swine in front
I will get onto BB forthwith to ban the bloody things pffft.
Complaint Status: Next!
KK
Never Surrender, Comrade
Senior Member
Yes I see what you've done there KK!. I'm the one who is now last because you are in front of me and I am behind!.Ach well, let's have a coffee until the queue goes down a tad.
"It's nice to be important, but it's more important to be nice". Treat others as you would like to be treated yourself and you won't go far wrong.
NMP Complaints Mismanagement Controller
Originally Posted by bottleblond
Yes I see what you've done there KK!. I'm the one who is now last because you are in front of me and I am behind!.
There you are!
You always were a stickler for the behind position, BB
KK
Never Surrender, Comrade
NMP Complaints Mismanagement Controller
MOTs
They should be scrapped and replaced with a Complaints-approved Self-Cert. There will be a small charge for this of course (payable to KK, Complaints Dept PO Box 777) but it will be far less hassle
Complaint Status: Being certified
NEXT!
KK
Never Surrender, Comrade
NMP Complaints Mismanagement Controller
We have had complaints about beastly intruders in the office. Please do not converse with any of these aliens as they are highly manipulative and dangerous. I will call the exterminators in tomorrow as we also have a few persistent strays squatting in the complaints shed
Status: Do not feed the beasts
KK
Never Surrender, Comrade
Removed User
Bloody Bitcoin emails, had 6 today.
NMP Complaints Mismanagement Controller
MM pays staff in Complaints Bitcoins, then they have to spend it through him because no one else takes such worthless cyber money. Now that we have only Mullet on the bogroll, he pays nothing, as Mullet is a volunteer fish we saved from being dredged in the river behind our office
I get paid in pounds sterling of course
Status: Waiting for payday
NEXT!
KK
Never Surrender, Comrade
NMP Complaints Mismanagement Controller
Royal Mail
Got an email from company I bought from saying Royal Mail had "successfully" delivered my parcel when it HADN'T! Rang RM who said they needed to "investigate" what had happened. They better bloody investigate and find it or BB will be round with her hobnail boots....the lying swines!
Status: Under investigation
KK
Never Surrender, Comrade
Senior Member
I have a question for you you KK. Do you regularly change your avatar? It always seems to be different.
(This is not a complaint)
"My only hope is this homemade Prozac... Needs more ice cream."
NMP Complaints Mismanagement Controller
Ah! Good question, Server. It depends on who's currently in charge of destroying complaints - eg, Captn Skully is running a skeleton service tonight
Status: Non-complaint bin
NEXT!
KK
Never Surrender, Comrade
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