I wasn't going to post but a friend reminded me how important success stories are so here's mine about today. Need to give a bit of background info as to why I coped so well so bear with me, it may be long!
I am a teacher and have emetophobia (fear of being sick - myself and others). Yesterday we went on a school trip and I was terrified all the way there on the coach. On the way back a little girl (L) sat by me. As we went under a tunnel she reached out for my hand and said 'I don't like tunnels but I'm going to be brave, can I hold your hand?' So we held hands and carried on talking. I said I don't like aeroplanes and I'm going on one soon and she said 'Oh, Miss, don't be scared. You should be brave like me, you will be fine and if not I can come and hold your hand like you held my hand under the tunnel when I was scared'.
So today, the very same child had an awful cough. Now in my mind coughing and being sick are very closely linked so I was on alert all morning. During middle lesson she was coughing badly so I sent her to get a drink but she seemed fine. The children worked at their tables and she was chatting away happily so I didn't think much of it. Then, just as I was getting the class back onto the carpet, I heard the noise and then someone shouted 'L's been sick'. Well obviously mind goes into overdrive and heart starts beating faster, hands and voice start shaking etc.
And then I stopped.
I remembered what she had said to me yesterday on the coach and thought I need to pull myself together, the child is 5 years old and has more sense than I do. I thought sod it, I'm gonna do it, I'm not gonna run away, I will be brave - L style!
So I went over and gave her some clean clothes. The rest of the class went to dinner and I phoned home then she sat with me in the classroom for half an hour, holding a bowl. Normally just the site of someone with a bowl would be enough to make me panic, but not today! While we were sitting in the classroom I actually cleaned it up. By this time my hands had stopped shaking, heart was still pounding and thoughts trying to stop me but L was chatting away which kept me occupied.
So I am in shock! Complete and utter disbelief that I have done it. Have had similar experiences twice now so maybe I'm getting somewhere. It is hard and it's those thoughts that need controlling (just writing about it now I can feel my heart going) but I'm pleased I managed to cope. Hopefully it will get a little easier every time.
So I feel like saying 'if I can do it so can you' but I'm sure you have all heard it a hundred times before! Thanks for listening.
Tammy x
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