I'm pregnant and terrified. Please help me

[lulag]

The doctor that I saw last week was supposed to get the midwife to call me to talk me through my fears, he half heartidly thought it might help. Well she hasn't called. I suppose she's got more important things. I'm on my own with this one.

I told my husband everything last night, including the fact that I lied to him and that I am thinking of an abortion. I couldn't lie to him anymore. He was very supportive and said he just didnt want to see me suffering. He would support me whatever decision I make. He was sad, but just loves me I guess. Lol x

[Raa]

Aw I'm so sorry sweetie! I totally understand how you feel. I wish I could give you a big hug right now. I had to have an abortion myself because of my fear and I really want to have the baby. You are NOT a bad person! And don't let anyone make you feel like less of a human because of what your going through, it's them who have the problem of lack of compassion not you. And apart from that a man will never understand what your feeling no matter what his degree says.

I think part of the reason women feel such anxieties towards pregnancy and childbirth are because of society and the excellent job they have done of making women feel like childbirth is this unnatural horrific life threatening condition. I know it is little comfort but remind yourself that pregnancy and childbirth is the most natural thing in the world and their most be a reason women are chosen to go through it because we are very able to do so better than men, it's evolution. Their would be no man kind if it wasn't for women, in a a way I think being pregnant is as close to God you can get. You are creating a new life and ONLY you can create that life.

Also, I recently watched this documentary by Ricki Lake that changed the way I saw childbirth. I know some parts were very grizzly but if you can get through that and see it,. when I saw natural childbirth for the first time it was unlike anything I have ever imagined about childbirth, it was beautiful.

Hang in there and remember you are strong, you can do anything you want.

[peach]

hey,

just thought id check in on you. im so so proud you told your hubby!!! and that he is supportive of you, shows how much he loves you!

it is an incredibly tough decision to make but your certainly not alone. we had a hard time finding people to help me in the first 3 months. i had a doctor who was very nice when you saw him, but he said so many times that he would call me with info on what to do next and id never hear from him!!! it wasnt untill i was 16 weeks that my mum finally said, thats it, were going to take you to the maternity ward at hospital and you can find someone there to help...i was terrified, but decided if i didnt like that hospital, or hte people, id go elsewhere....but i did! i told them just how bad i was, about my prev termination and my extreme fear..... i met my midwife there who was just wonderful! she handles me with kid gloves and has been very nice when ive refused a few of the tests. shes allowed me to have as little intervention as possible, which for me has been good as i would freak out every time i had to go lol!

anyway, im going on a bit here lol!. just want you to know your not alone, and im still here whenever you want to chat.