panic attacks are back

[nic28]

Ive just come across this site and read a few posts and its so nice to know im not alone with this.I had my first panic attack around 5 years ago in a waiting room for no reason,it just came on,after that i started to get them all the time,usually in a place where i knew id look a freak if one started..waiting rooms,ques,supermarkets.To cut a very long story short i ended up on fluoxetine and propranolol for it as it was taking over my life and also ruining my 2 childrens as i never wanted to take them anywhere that had too many people in it including their own school.After a while the medication worked,i still felt un easy in these places but it stopped going into full blown panic attacks.I thought i was cured...
4 years later i am now suffering again,i am due to have my 3rd child in 5 days,my boyfriend planned the baby with me then decided to leave me when i was 5 months pregnant so im doing it alone with the help of family and friends of course.My doctor weened me off fluoxetine until i eventually stopped taking it in march as he said it could be a danger to the baby,id had no probs up until now,ive started getting all my panic symptoms back,i think the worry of the upcoming labour has started it but now the thought are back in my head i cant get them out again.Everywhere i go,i feel one coming,the school yard especially where i have to take my two older children,im at the point im dreading having to leave the house.The doctors have put me back on a low dose of fluoxetine but i remember from last time,that will make me feel worse before better.Im so upset this is back,most people look forward to things like days out,going for meals and going to watch their childrens school plays,theyre all nightmares for me and even if i dont have a panic attack im on edge in these places until i can get out.I really hate living like this,im only 28 and cant face a life like this forever and its so not fair on my kids who have to miss out on things because of me.

[diane07]

Hi nic28

We just wanted to welcome you aboard to NMP. We hope you enjoy your stay here and get all the support and advice you need.

Please take some time to read the website articles on the left as well for loads of advice and tips.

[SeeBeeS]

Is citalopram contrary to working night shift, ,my occupational health department think so, and now my GP's prescription is putting my continued employment under threat.... please advise?

[Kelley]

Hi Nic.
Everyone on this site can understand where you are and you need to realise that so many people suffer just as you do everyday but having this site as a crotch is what makes the difference. The great thing for you this time is that you found us and you will most definately find enough reassurance to make it through the worst.
Have you read through the topics in the left column? There is so much helpful information there and also if you put a specific issue in the search bar you will see loads of topics on what it is that is bothering you the most.
Are you afraid of your symptoms? Is that what is making you panic the most? Panic attacks can be the most frightening experience and when you don't have the information on hand to reassure you it doesn't help. Dr Claire Weekes was an absolutely amazing doctor who has a couple of books available that turned my life around (as did the support of this site). If you can get your hands on one of these then it'll be the best thing you have ever done!
For the time being, try to distract yourself and keep busy. Remind yourself that it is only panic and it is not going to hurt you in anyway. Allow yourself to feel all the sensations that panic brings and let it run its course with the attitude that it will pass and you are safe. As soon as you feel it coming on, get up and walk around the house. You could try clapping your hands and singing as a distraction while you keep telling yourself that you are in full control and it is all a hoax. Don't allow guilt to suck you in. Your kids will be just fine and in no time you will be feeling strong enough to give life your all again.
There is so much you need to learn about with panic, once all the facts are in your head it will be so much easier to work through. Please read as many resources as you can and have faith that everything is just as it should be, you are in the right position and you are safe.

Keep in touch.
Kel

[Vanilla Sky]

H and welcome to NMP Paige x

[nic28]

Thankyou for taking time to answer me,i do feel very alone with this.My family try to understand but dont think they can get their heads around why i feel such a need to escape when im in a que or something.People think panic attacks only come on if you panic about something scary,mine however can come on just sat in front of the tele.I seem to have taught myself to bring them on,especially when i suddenly realise its been a while since i last had one,then i automatically get the symptoms back just because ive thought about it!I know it cant kill me and i do sit and tell myself,whats the worse that could happen but it doesnt stop that terrible feeling of battling with your own mind when youre in a public place.Ive got to go watch my sons school play next week,im dreading it,i should be looking forward to seeing him but all i can think about is the dreaded feelings coming and the need to get out,i have to sit as far to the back as possible and make sure i have a clear exit to the door and also have to take a bottle of water everywhere with me as it seems to snap me out of it a bit.I hate knowing that im doing this to myself,its my own head doing it but its so powerful.Im finding driving brings them on too as i imagine its going to happen at traffic lights or something where i cant pull up.This is no life to live,every waking moment,im dreading the next place ive got to go that will make me uncomfortable.

[Kelley]

Nic, once you come to realise the simplicity of this problem you will begin to see life in a different light.
I can't stress enough the importance of educating yourself on all topics anxiety! You are the classic case and things as little as sitting away from the exit can come so easy once you understand that you are not alone in this.
I absolutely agree with you that when you are by yourself and these feelings come on out of the blue that all you can do is panic more because it is expected to think the worst, there's that little voice inside your head that says, i know it can't hurt me but what if this time my body actually gives in and this is it!!! Well when that happens next time, tell yourself WHAT IF IT DOESN'T???? What if it is better than the last one and you actually manage to distract yourself? What if you don't add second fear and it dissolves before it peaks? What if???? The more you can reassure yourself with positive comments the less and less these things will come on. It's all thoughts and that's all. Ask the panic to come, tell it you can handle it, tell it how much you were expecting it to come and that this time you are going to feel all the sensations it brings and you are going to continue what you were doing in the process. And when it's over you will remind yourself just how strong your mind and body really is.