agoraphobia and moving house

[angel light]

A big hello to everyone

Im new here and was wondering if anyone can help with any advice or tips.I currently have agoraphobia with graded exposure i can drive alone 3-4 miles and shop and socialise within that area.

With a trusted person I can be a passenger about 20 miles or so - hard though!

September due to a relationship breakdown I have got to do a journey as a passenger about 1 hour 15 mins ( 60 odd mile id say) im moving back in with my parents for a while and be near my family again.

I havnt been outside this 20 mile span in 2 years now and the thought of making this journey is terrible for me.Also being in a strange house and towwn leaving my comfort zone.

Graded exposure has worked for me but it hasnt done it quick enough for me to travel september, I am being a passenger 2 or 3 times a week now and travelling down the route I will take - but I havnt got many weeks left.

Any help or advise will greatly help - or anybody moved or had simliar situations?

thanks Wendy xx

[Alabasterlyn]

There are a lot of us on here that have agoraphobia, myself included, so I'm sure you will get other responses soon too. From the sound of it you are doing very well with the graded exposure already, which is great

The things that come to my mind about your moving are to try and make sure that when you travel you do so at a time of day that you find your anxiety is at it's lowest. I always find travelling in the dark much easier, I can do an hour as a passenger at night, but in the daytime probably only about 20mins. It would probably be a good idea to travel when the roads are not busy too so it will make the journey less stressful. Try and take as many props with you in the car, like a laptop or an iPod with things on it that you find relaxing so that if you do feel anxious you can distract yourself.

I moved house about 12yrs ago and due to some last minute hitches with the deal my other half and I were left homeless for 2wks, which for someone with agoraphobia has the potential to be a nightmare and all my things were packed up for moving. We spent 2wks living on someone's sofabed and I didn't even know this person and my other half was at work all day and I was on my own in this strange flat, yet I was fine. It really is surprising what we are able to do when we have no option but to do something

[PixieL]

Hi angel light, i am in the exact same position as you; agoraphobic and soon to be moving house in another county, an hour an a half drive away give or take. All i can suggest is you have a chat with your dr and mental health support team if you have one, mine were fantastic, my social worker will be coming with me on the day i move and my dr has provided me with some stronger medication for the move. As alabasterlyn suggested, try to travel at a time of day and on a day thats best for you, night time is always better as less people and cars around. Also as said take distraction things with you, such as an ipod or a handheld game console like a DS or PSP, also a bottle of water, paper bag and a hand held elctronic fan, i always find that helps, and poss a bar of choc or a packet of crisps in case you get the shakes. Good luck to you xx

[diane07]

I moved about 8 weeks ago, i wouldn't have been able to do that journey two years ago but i just kept on doing it over and over again and now it doesn't bother me in the slightest, my ipod has got me over these hurdles.

The problem we have is we sit and analyse the situation, constantly questioning ourselves..........can i do it............what if i panic.........what if this..........what if that.

We are already putting negative thoughts in our heads, try thinking it in a different way, like how great will it be for you to have all that support around you.

I got over my fear of journeys by breaking the journey down, if it was an hour i would break it down to 20 minute stages, each stage i got to i felt like i had accomplished something good.

The thought is usually worse than the deed.

I wish you well on your move.

di x

[Vixxy]

Hi im in a similar position. I can only go so far away from my home before I start to get really dizzy etc with anxiety.
I need to move to my new home about an hour away too. Seems there are a few of us in this position. Maybe we can all give each other support?

[PixieL]

Thats a great idea vixxy, if any of you want to do that count me in, im worried about the move and as diane07 said we over think things, im sure we could all use each others support.

[Vixxy]

Okies lets do it!!
Do you have a date that you have to move in by?
Also whats the exact distance from where you are now, to the new house?
Do you drive?

[Vixxy]

Do you have a date that you have to move in by?
No
Also whats the exact distance from where you are now, to the new house?
37.8 miles 48 minutes if I take the M3 (EEEEK!)
or
43.4 miles 1 hr 24 minutes if I go on the A/B roads
Do you drive?
Yes

[diane07]

vix,

is it you that will be driving there? or is someone else doing it.

di x

[mumble]

When I was at my worst, I realised I could no longer cope on my own, so my father arranged a day to drive me all the way from Surrey down to Bournemouth to my fiance's. I managed it with a combination of distraction by talking to him, and also taking half an ativan.