So scared

[shakylady]

Hi,

I have GAD and I also suffer with Social Anxiety and do find it very hard to leave the house some days!

I am being totally honest with myself here and hope no one judges me for this!

I have been unable to work for years because of my anxiety and have recently been seeking help to get myself back into work through a Mental Health Clinic which my GP referred me to.

I am in a unhealthy relationship and I know this, I just find it soooo difficult to end it. I do not love this person anymore and I am with him for all the wrong reasons, two of them being financial help and company!?

I was due to go to the Mental Health Clinic this week for my first appt but then I found out I am PREGNANT........

This has devestated me and I have made a definate decision to have a termination. I have an 8yr old daughter who I love to bits and I do not wish to have anymore children especially under these circumstances.

I am soo scared going through with this termination through fear of panicking and just loosing it in hospital. I can not even go to the shops without panicking so what the hell am I going to be like having to go to hospital. I keep thinking I will go in there and end up being sectioned!!

I know what I have got to do but it is just freaking me out. I do not know whether to tell my parents (as I do not want to worry them) but would be nice to have their support?

My partner is supporting my decision but I want to end this relationship once the termination is over as I can not see a future for us anymore....

It is just really hard at the momment and am finding I just do not want to get out of bed!! I think I am getting depressed (if I wasnt before).

[Alexandra]

Hiya

I completely understand how you feel hun. As i have had days where i could'nt get myself out the front door without getting myself into a complete panic. Im slowly moving on from that now im happy to say & i know deep down you will to.

Take Care



Alexandra

[Karen]

Hi Shakylady

No one here is going to judge you and it sounds like you have made a brave and difficult decision and the one which feels best for you in your current circumstances.

If you do not feel able to speak to your parents or family, is there a friend you could talk to and who might be able to go with you for support?

It might also help to tell the clinic that you suffer from anxiety and social phobia as they may be able to give you something to help you feel a bit calmer as soon as you arrive.

This is a difficult time for you and our thoughts are with you. We are here for support to help you through this.

Karen



Happiness is not a state to arrive at but a manner of travelling.

[Piglet]

I agree with Karen.

This is a very hard thing to go through on your own and I think I would confide in somebody - are you sure your parents aren't the ones???

Piglet xxxx

[Meg]

You don't mention how many weeks you are..

You wil need to be counselled and to see 2 doctors first and then have it scheduled. Please do tell them how anxious you are and they will make it as easy as possible for you perhaps with some medication help for that day.

Meg
www.anxietymanagementltd.com

Your anxiety is the human representation of the pictures that you paint using your many vivid colours of revolving and reoccurring thoughts.
How big is your gallery ?

[shakylady]

Hi,

Thanks for advice guys. I went to see my GP and he has said wait for an appt in writing from the hospital. I am roughly 5 weeks... this will be confirmed when I go to hospital.

I know there are two options a pill to start it off or an operation but you need to be 9weeks or more for the operation.

I have told my Sister and she is there for support but do not want to burden her too much as she has 3 kids a hectic job and her husband has just been made redundant.

Like I said before my partner? is going to come with me and be with me throughout this but once this is over we are going are separate ways. He is still hoping that we will stay together but I know this is not going to make me happy, not anymore.

I think I want to tell my parents but my mum can not handle too much stress as she worries like mad and also has schizophrenia and I do not want to be responsible for causing her to get ill again.

I will tell the hospital what I suffer with and I also have valium for when I get really bad so will see what they say......

Just got to wait for that letter to say when the hospital appt is....

[nomorepanic]

Shaky

Although the post started off with some doubts I think you have been very strong and made your decision about both the pregnancy and the partner situation. They are both brave decisions to make and I wish you well with it all.

I hope all goes well and the split with the partner is something that will improve your life for you. Good luck with it all.

Nicola

[munchkin555]

hi
i know how u feel hun, when my anxiety started i couldnt go out alone, but now when my anxiety starts like that i force myself to go out coz i know deep down that nothing bad will happen to me
take care
good luck
xx