Having another low mood day

[phil06]

It's that time of year where I can feel quite bad sometimes..near my birthday..where I look back on alot of my failures..or lack of achievement. I feel I've had quite a poor year as I have had so many disappointments.

I feel really down and low about being single..people say there's plenty of time..(that was last year, and the year before)..not had a serious relationship in like over three years and I'm going to be 22 next month..I don't want the same next year or the year after. The usual being in a dead end job and not picking a career gets me down too...failing my driving test 4 times and giving up this year makes me down too.

I feel really bad about converting to a teenager to an adult still...21 being the last special birthday but feel just down about it. See so many people settling down, frustrates me more as I don't have a good enough social life to be out every weekend. I am quite worried that I'll look back in 10 years and say I wish I had done this different. I have felt about 100 for the last 2/3 years though. More so this year due to anxiety.

I do put so much pressure and significance on success and so on. I hate being single..to the degree I over try, when I don't try I remain isolated. I find it hard to talk about as it hurts me all the rejection I've had...worse than a break up for sure. I just want to be happy, fed up moaning each year..it's hard to imagine myself settled..or having a good year.

I've long done with positives like saving money..just feel so depressed...settling old would also depress me just because there's alot of things I enjoy..going to clubs and stuff that I want to do young...concerts, stuff like that. I feel a bit sad to moan just fed up feeling this way...I want to be relaxed about life again...with good things around me like a g.f. ...just hope tomorrow will be better.

[unspoken]

I'm feeling low today as well. I thought I'd reply to your thread since it's a bit dispiriting to post a thread and not get any replies. I'm not sure I can give much advice or whatever, but just to let you know that there are people reading your thread and in similar situations.

There's all this pressure to be 'achieving' - 'growing' - doing things our parents can be proud of and settling into relationships and progressing through careers. The reality is a whole lot different for most people our age. But still, other people manage to make it look like they've got it more figured out, so those of us who've succumbed to depression feel like we've really hit the bottom of the barrel. It's hard to stop these kind of thoughts. I could recommend CBT and all that, but actually watching TV or doing something simple but enjoyable might be enough to lift your mood for the time being, then you can look at these thoughts again at a time when you're not feeling as low and try to tackle them then.

[Nigel]

Hi Phil,

Me too re the birthday feelings. It’s looming and I always find myself thinking back over another wasted year. Another year of not achieving anything. And I’ve had a few more of them than you have

Then despite making myself feel bad about it, I then have all the same thoughts again at New Year

About the being single bit. It’s funny how those that are wish they weren’t, but those that aren’t wish they still were. I guess the secret is to try and be happy in whatever situation you find yourself to be in.

Take care,
Nigel

[daybyday]

Me too. I started a new post, but deleted it because I just feel so low.