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Thread: Reasurance desperately needed!

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
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    80

    Reasurance desperately needed!

    I've suffered with anxiety since I was 4 weeks pregnant with my son in November 2008. After his birth it got much much worse and I ended up having CBT which unfortunately didn't help as much as I would like. My main symptoms are head pressure (like I'm literally boiling like a kettle) and other head sensations, numbness and when I get very scared my heart will beat ridiculously fast, I tremble internally and I think I'm going crazy. Despite living with this almost 24/7 I live relatively normal life, go to work, socialise, do things with my gorgeous son altho it can be very difficult and I do get down about it from time to time.

    Well anyway I've just fallen pregnant in the first month of trying to conceive (which has shocked me as I was convinced my ongoing anxiety would stop me ovulating or something like that). Although I know that I suffered with my first pregnancy and my son was born perfectly normal I can't help but worry because my anxiety is far more severe this time and it was present when I actually conceived (unlike the last time). I've had quite a good couple of weeks but the past few days have been awful, constant head pressure and last night my heart was beating like mad although I was sat in bed completely still and I've been having scary thoughts that pop into my head and then I've been even more scared for thinking them and thought I was going mad which just fuelled the anxiety even more.

    I'm just terrified about the affects this will have on my baby, it's so negative and awful but I just can't imagine the pregnancy going right because of the way I feel. I am so so so frightened of having a disabled child and it was my anxiety that caused it, it's all I think about. I think I'm going to have to have more CBT to help me through the pregnancy if all goes right. It's awful coz this is all I want, marriage and children yet its the thing that causes me all this worry.

    Will my baby be ok? I'm only 4 weeks and so scared that condtant anxiety will influence the way it develops. I'm so down a out it when all I want to do is be happy.

    Thank you for any replies xxxxx

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    Posts
    512

    Re: Reasurance desperately needed!

    hello hun i cant belive i found someone with head pressure also wow..ive wrote on here so many times and no one realy understood what i was going threw ive had head pressure for 1 year bad iam not sure what cause it but i know its awfull and sceary wish it would go away,,,,and u haven another baby hun u will be fine i had very bad head pressure my last baby and he came out fine hun it will be ok anx cant hurt ur baby i wish i could help u more hun ...have u ever been to doc for head pressure if so what did thay say ive never been ...my head pressure affects my everyday life were i cant sometimes get up cause the pressure is so bad.....hun if u need to talk or i can help in anyway feel free to write me tc hun ...
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    Jessica

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Posts
    80

    Re: Reasurance desperately needed!

    Hi Jessica haha I've just responded to your post before I realised that you had responded to mine!! Yes this head pressure feels absolutely dreadful and it is with me for the majority of each day. It's very reassuring to know that you also experienced it through pregnancy and everything was ok, it just worries me sick and just fuels the anxiety more. I can be talking to people while I'm feeling all this pressure and I just don't know how I manage to remain so normal in front of them, I appear so normal yet inside I'm going through hell. Do you enjoy sneezing? I certainly do coz I get this little tiny release where my head just feels relaxed....until it starts up again and I'll wake up in the morning feeling fine for two minutes until I remember 'oh I've got anxiety' and wham it's back! I try to control it with breathing but then I end up getting a pressure feeling on my chest as if I can't get enough oxygen in which worries me now I'm pregnant. I've suffered so long that I do now get the odd panic attack where my heart races and imso scared of everything. Awful awful awful. As I said on your post feel free to pm me at anytime!

    Take care, nice to meet you! XxxxxX

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Posts
    80

    Re: Reasurance desperately needed!

    Forgot to say my doctor said 'well you're still here so nothing to worry about' it sounds a bit crap but he's actually really good, he has a sense of humour which I find helps and he gives me plenty of time, never rushes me out of the door. He said he doesn't know why anxiety expresses itself this way but many of his patients report this sensation a lot xxxx

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    56

    Re: Reasurance desperately needed!

    Hi Hugs!

    I'm in my first pregnancy and, like you, got pregnant the first month trying and have been struggling with anxiety ever since (for me focused on a fear of dying, not helped by having some real health problems which complicate things).

    I'm now 17 weeks. It's been really tough, and at points I still feel like I can't do it, but I'm hanging in there. Try to remember you have done this before, and everything was ok, and it will be again. What really helped me was seeing a midwife early - I was very honest with my GP, and got referred to the mental health midwife who is used to dealing with people with these sorts of problems. She has been just brilliant, so perhaps there is someone similar you can be referred to?

    Despite all the stress, I've had two scans and an antenatal check last week and my baby is just fine. Growing really well, strong pulse, no problems. They're strong, and they take just what they need from us, so don't worry about the baby.

    Happy to chat anytime,
    Genie

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Location
    , , USA.
    Posts
    316

    Re: Reasurance desperately needed!

    I am also extremly anxious this time around. But, I can tell you that I was even more anxious with my son, who is 6 now. I was terrified that my intense anxiety was going to turn into post partum psychosis after his birth. I was seriously terrified... But, I was actually amazed at how good I felt after he was born. Of course the anxiety was still there, that never goes away, but it was just back to its normal levels from before the pregnancy. It was totally managable. Pregnancy does a lot of crazy things to our body that can definitely cause horrible anxiety. For example, during that pregnanct my hear rate was ALWAYS at around 110-120. I felt on edge constantly. Literaly the day after he was born I felt my heart rate settle down and it went back to my normal 80-90. Anyway, just wanted to let you know there is hope, and you will get better.
    __________________
    Courage does not always roar. Sometimes, it is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, "I will try again tomorrow".

    -- Anonymous


  7. #7
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
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    80

    Re: Reasurance desperately needed!

    I've thought about suffering from partum psychosis too and it terrifies me!!!!! After having my son I felt fantastic in hospital because I could see him and he was beautiful and healthy and completely unaffected by my anxiety but then when I came home it came back but 5 times worse, I was terrified that I would lose him now that he was born or I would die and leave him. My anxiety a year after his birth is now worse than ever and my obsession with having more children and them being healthy is what has driven me to how terrible I feel to this day. I am trying so so so hard to remain postive but I'm just hoping that having my second baby won't tip me over the edge. I only fear this when my anxiety is really high, I believe deep down that everything will be ok. Positive positive thoughts!! I have suffered two years now and I still go to work, I run a house, I socialise and I still haven't cracked, I have faith

    xxxxxxxx

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    , , United Kingdom.
    Posts
    237

    Re: Reasurance desperately needed!

    Hi hugs,

    are you currently receiving any professional support? I just wondered if there may be a motherhood and mental health team in your area. My friend works as a nurse on one and they are fantastic and help people who suffer with anxiety/ depression during pregnancy and also with people with more severe mental health problems ( eg, bipolar). It may be worth asking your GP about xxx

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