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Thread: Time to reduce the dose? (Good news and bad news)

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Mar 2009

    Time to reduce the dose? (Good news and bad news)

    Hi all!

    Long post again - sorry - maybe people will relate to some or all of it though!

    After a battle against anxiety and depression that has lasted 19 months I am back at work and rebuilding my life - hopefully this will prove to everyone who has suffered with these horrible afflictions that there is hope if you persevere!

    I've rebuilt some burned bridges with old friends and I am doing better at work than I have done anywhere else. The trouble is, I am finding myself burned out and exhausted by the demands of my job.

    I can cope with the work ok, but it's leaving me tired out, and the hours are bordering on horrendous. I've got a 10-hour shift on Christmas Eve!

    It's got to the point where I have had two migraines in one week - this one has caused me to have my first time off sick and I am having tomorrow off as well since I still feel like complete crud. I feel emotionally, mentally and physically burned out.

    I love my job and I am getting on reasonably well with my new team even though I am trying to keep some distance after what happened in training. The gay bloke on the team offered me some man-love, which I politely declined, and I am on-off seeing a girl.

    My family has had some problems with a weirdo living on our street (the usual sanctimonious prat who thinks they are always right and we are always wrong) and next door neighbour's daughter. These problems have resulted in an unexpected show of support from our other neighbours.

    Thing is, this is a hell of a change from my normal life, and I am finding it very hard to get up in the morning cos I am constantly knackered. I can't enjoy my days off cos I am too tired.

    I have considered reducing my citalopram dose since the job and my new hobbies keep me too busy to have time for the chatterbox. Also, the cit is probably what's making me so tired in the morning.

    On the other hand, my best mate is in a very dark place (although he has picked up a lot since I got back in touch), and I am scared that if I reduce my dose of cit I will join him! I cannot go through all those side effects again. Basically I'm scared!

    I'm not sure what the point of this thread is, I just wanted to know what people think. Is this the wrong time to think about reducing my cit dose? Am I wimping out and returning to my old pattern of behaviour by ringing in sick due to exhaustion? Is it weird to be exhausted after just 2 (eventful) months? And does the Great Unclean One get +2 Strength from his flail? (Ok, so the last question is Warhammer, I just wondered if anyone knew.)
    Last edited by NoPoet; 27-09-10 at 23:42.
    Citalopram Survival Guide
    Inositol Survival Guide

    What would you do if you weren't afraid?

    I drew the line between hope and despair, and the line will hold.

    "Forth now, and fear no darkness!"

  2. #2
    Join Date
    May 2008

    Re: Time to reduce the dose? (Good news and bad news)

    Hmmm...gut feeling reply coming up since you're the expert on Cit, I'm just a 6 month user!

    This is not the time to consider reducing..if you're doubting the wisdom of doing it yourself then you know that you are going to have problems.

    I think the exhaustion is purely down to the hours that you are working, not the Cit. There also seems to be a whole heap of other stuff going on in your life that will contribute towards the way you feel, it seems it is the return to "normality" that has knocked you sideways for a bit.

    Also the remergence of your best mate..I don't need to tell you that although I'm sure you are doing a great job in helping him, close involvement in someone elses problems can take a heavy toll on you.
    Maybe you need to re-evaluate what is a safe limit in regards to how much time you spend helping him.

    I've waffled on but really think you need to give yourself more time before you make any changes to your medication. Maybe look at things again after Christmas or New Year and see how you are feeling then.

    One last point..I know what you mean about the wimping out but is there any way you can get the hours reduced? If not, I think you are going to have to organise your time so that you are using it wisely and not wasting it worrying about other stuff.

    There is time enough for that in the future but it's still early days for you so give yourself a break.
    We will NEVER surrender comrade, remember always..actions speak louder than words!!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Mar 2009

    Re: Time to reduce the dose? (Good news and bad news)

    Thanks Ladybird, you speak a lot of sense! To be honest your words agree with what my mate said this morning. He does not seem to be quite so bad as I thought these days, he rallied enough to give me an amazing pep talk this morning, and he would have agreed 100% with you... he never agrees 100% with anyone, normally.

    He helped me to find what I've lost: the motivation, the reason, for keeping going with work. We worked out a plan together - hit the gym, get away from it all for a day, pay our debts, save some money for Xmas and special occasions, get some cool clothes and have a night out. Basically boost our fitness and our confidence, and do something that takes us away from stress.

    When it comes to coming off Cit I go into a cold sweat - partly cos I'm afraid of side effects, partly because the cit feels like a "buffer" against myself and my negative feelings. Who knows, maybe next year when I start to reduce my dose, my new coping stratagies will help and I won't relapse. Then there will be something else to add to the Citalopram Survival Guide.

    With a new job, long hours, friendships breaking up and being rebuilt, relationship issues, issues at home and so on, it really isn't surprising that someone stress-prone will end up burning out. It's a lot easier for me to give advice to others than to listen to myself.

    I'll see how tomorrow goes at work and if my team leader says anything, I'll just explain that I am finding the working hours hard to get used to.

    I'm going to paraphrase what my mate said because I can almost guarantee that they will help to bolster anyone who is struggling to get their lives back on track by getting a job:

    "By the end of the year you could have a nice powerful saloon car, be fit and feel well, nice clothes... just picture how successful your life could and give yourself a kick up the arse."

    "Imagine going out round the pubs in town at xmas with nice clothes on, having paid your folks off, with a bit of muscle on, confident, with money in your pocket, a good job and single with the excitement of meeting someone new - OR eventually losing or quitting the job and spending the entire xmas with your folks, still in debt, no confidence, still living at home having not moved on since you left school... if I were in your position mate, I'd be buzzing at all the opportunity I had."

    Wise words, and an inspiration for all of us I think!

    EDIT: P.S. The Great Unclean One DOES get +2 strength from its flail.
    Citalopram Survival Guide
    Inositol Survival Guide

    What would you do if you weren't afraid?

    I drew the line between hope and despair, and the line will hold.

    "Forth now, and fear no darkness!"

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