Learning to drive

[blackie]

Hi

I am 22 and I have been agoraphobic for about 4 years now and been anxious for a lot longer. This last year i have started to be able to go out into town and see my therpist once a week. But i have to rely on my parents as i never managed to take my driving test. I can also walk to my allotment which is about a 5 min walk from home and manage the dentists on my own if i get a lift and so on. But now i am thinking about learning to drive again. Not being able to get anywhere makes me feel really trapped. The problem is i cannot imagine ever being able to drive. The thought of sitting in a car really scares me. I hate feeling so anxious because it makes me feel out of control. I am scared i will freeze up, lose control and cause an accident. Even if i did manage to drive safely i can't imagine ever been able to drive alone freely. I was just wondering if anyone else had been in this situation. I desberatly want my freedom to live my life instead of being trapped at home. I live in a small village so to get anywhere needs a car.

Many thanks
Blackie

[ditzygirl]

You are doing really well in getting your back - well done.

If you can afford it why don't you book a lesson or two and see how you feel.
Can anyone recommend an instructor who will be sympathetic?

Driving instructors should be used to very anxious people - its scary to start with for most of us.
But the more you do it the more confident you will feel.

Sounds as if your parents are really supportive, maybe tell hem how your feeling and ask if you can practise sitting in the driving seat of their car while is stationary. It will be hard to start with but it's worth I try.

You should be really really proud of yoursefl for hinking so positively so Go for it!!!!!!

And keep us informed of how your doingx

[sb001f8994]

You are doing very well, Im getting out more too. Ive tried driving but it wasnt for me...not good behind the wheel and fear I might kill someone, not neccessarily a pedestrian but the passengers with me!!! A friend of mine who was agoraphobic learnt to drive and has never looked back, she gained more confindence and is independant and is now never in.
Good look and take care,

[blackie]

Hi

Thanks for the reply. I have my old driving instructor who was really friendly and seen me break down so many times before when i tried last time (about 5 years ago) that i dont feel so bad about it. One less thing to worry about

My parents haven't said much but i get the feeling that they dont think i can do it so will just be throwing money away as i still find it so hard to go out.

Anyway i will phone her and book a lesson. I just wish i had a little more confidence in my ability. I guess that will come with time?

Thanks
Blackie

[blackie]

Hi Carol,

Well done on getting out more. Thats great!!! Keep at it. Thats good about your friend and gives hope to others. It will be hard. Like you i am very worried about causing an accident and hurting someone. But the instructors car does have duel control. I guess the only way to overcome these fears is to try. Just very hard to put yourself in a position that i find so painful.

Blackie

[blueangel]

I think it's a really good idea to give it a try. If you don't, then you'll never know whether you could do it or not, but at least if you have a couple of lessons you'll have more idea about whether you think you can carry on with it.

It's very true though, if you can crack this one it will help you feel a lot less trapped at home.

[blackie]

Thanks blueangel. I have booked a lesson for THIS WEDNESDAY!!! Wasn't expecting her to be free so quickly. Anyway less time to worry. She has been very understanding and we are going to take it slow.

Thanks guys
Blackie

[ditzygirl]

THAT'S BRILLIANT!!!!! WELL DONE!!!!!!!



GOOD LUCK AND LET US KNOW HOW YOU GET ONXX

[unspoken]

That's great

See how that lesson goes, really. It's really important to have an understanding instructor, which you seem to have. I'm the same age as you but I never tried driving at all until earlier this year. It is a really good confidence booster. It is scary but I find there is so much concentration involved in driving that I don't really have the time to be anxious. I really hope it goes well for you, try to enjoy it and just think about it as a one-off experience to see what you think about driving again rather than something that you have to continue with.

[blackie]

Hi

Thanks ditzygirl and unspoekn.

I did it./ I drove along the road through my village, then through the roads of the neibouring village then along the duel carridgeway to get home. I can't belive i managed to do so much. I didn't panic and although i did feel anxious i was so busy concentrating on what i was doing it was ok. My driving instructor is fantastic and i feel really hopeful that i can do it. I know i still have a way to go to build confidence but i am starting to feel i can do it. Got the next lesson booked so i am just going to take it one lesson at a time

Thanks for all the support
Blackie