Hello everyone, my name is Mary im 34 and have experienced my first panic attack two weeks ago and they havent stopped since. Iam very frightened, tired and totally confused. It all started after i suffered a reaction to a tablet my doctor had given me, an antidepresant, i took it early on the saturday morning and felt fine, my husband and foster child had gone out ,i sat down to watch abit of telly which is something i rarely do and i felt abit sick so i went to bed to lay down, i was sick and was feeling worse so i called my sister(my mobile was down stairs and i didnt have the energy to move and i dont know his number.... stupid girl) to call my husband to ask him to come home, which he did, he said i would be fine he got my mobile for me and him and the foster boy went off to watch the football. I fell asleep only to wake up to the worst feeling all over me i thought i was going to die! i was cold but boiling, shaking ,pins and neddles eveywhere i was so so so frightened i didnt know what to do..so i tried to call my husband but it went straight onto his answer phone which freaked me out even more so then i tried my family and friends but again i kept getting answer phones, by this point i thought i was going to faint or die on my own, then i heard voices outside and i thought it must be my neighbour, so some how i got to the front door, opened it and stumbled out... in very bright pink pyjamas, i must of looked a right sight, but it wasnt my neighbour it was a stranger i asked her to help me but she basically told me to get lost which freaked me out even more...nice lady, i dont think! i got myself indoors and called my mum who was fantastic. she herself experinced panic attacks when i was a child!! she tried to calm me down but in the end called me an ambulance which came very quickly i was in such a state i really thought i was going to pop my clogs, i calmed down when the paramedics were with me i felt so awful that i had wasted their time but they were very kind my husband had called me back and got his mum and dad to come round until he got home, oh it was such a relief to see him but over the next 24 hours the attacks came and went i was totally shattered and still so scared on the sunday i started to get horrible thoughts which again totally scared me beyond belief my sister was fab and looked after our foster child .on the monday i went to the doctors i was a complete mess she said i had been having panic attacks and she gave me somethings to calm me dowm which i was frightened to take after taking the tablet saturday i darent take any of them...but i was still getting the horrible feelings and was so worn out so my husband sat with me while i had them..hes such a wonderful person i rested for a few days and last week end was not too bad but i still had horrible butterflys in my tummy then monday night they started again the shakes the pins and needles horrible thoughts the worst feelings in the world i cant describe and most of all the loneliness my husband has been so wonderful and my friends too but when im having one of those moments it scares me so much .ive been to see a counsellor which the doctor recommened and that seems to help but in the back of my mind im thinking whens it going to happen again which i know is stupid because im making myself worse...yet again im a stupid girl!but the other day i was sopleased to find this site i sat and cried i didnt feel so lonely i have spent the last three days looking through it(between panics)iam so grateful to Nicola and the rest of you Thankyou for being there x ps iam sorry if i have waffled on but it has been so nice to get this all off my chest im not very good on the computor so if there is alot of mistakes im sorry thankyou again x
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