This one's for all my fellow-blushers. Just to let you know about something that's helped me a lot- cover make up.. I found out about it when looking into more drastic surgical solutions, via someone who had posted something online about his experiences. We ended up having email chats and he told me about cover products that are almost un-detectable, and hide facial redness. And although i think this one's a bit easier for women as there's no stigma around us wearing make up, the fact that a guy recommended it should provide reassurance that men can use it too (and I can confirm that it is pretty well invisible).
So anyway, following his advice, I ended up going for a colour match appointment, and getting some really good make up.
I've been using the stuff ever since, and found it a massive help. For me, a big part of my phobia is (was) the fear of going red whether while speaking in public or just in a normal social situation, thereby undermining myself and coming across weird or incompetent or whatever. So, knowing that people won't see if I blush usually breaks the cycle so i don't go red to start with. THis is a massive relief after carrying around almost constant anxiety about it for approaching 2 decades, with dimly lit places my only refuge!
In public speaking situations I sometimes I still do get the familiar burn, and then i feel supported by knowing no-one can see. I do still feel worried that my blush is visible (usually when it happens i'm not near a mirror, as it's usually in a meeting while i'm speaking!) but I just have faith that it's working, and that helps me plough on till the heat wave has gone
Anyway, i'm just posting this because i want to share some good news / hope with other sufferers. I wish i'd discovered it much earlier as I'd already been suffering a looong time before I did. I've been having a particularly challenging period in terms of career this past year and i don't actually think i could have managed without it. It doesn't address underlying anxiety and sadness, but at least i can hold down a job, and also be free of a major distraction to addressing what's really going on for me.
I don't want anyone to think i'm here to plug a product, so i'm not mentioning any in particular. But an easy way to find out more is to search for skin camouflage products. I found a shop where they sell them which means it's possible to test out colours for yourself. They're also available from lots of online stores.
As mentioned above, I had the colour-match done by a specialist who is trained to do it e.g. for people with birth marks or other permanent discolouration, but i wouldn't say that is essential- it's not really any different to choosing a normal foundation. However, she did help me have confidence in the product, and helped me find an alternative one when the brand I first got was discontinued (she did that for free which was nice of her).
The other thing was that she gave me a letter for my GP saying I needed it for my skin discolouration (there's some official term she used for it, which i've forgotten), and if I had wanted to use that, it would have allowed me to get the stuff on the NHS. In my case, my lack of faith in doctors and knowing how easily employers can circumvent medical confidentiality, I personally decided to just buy the stuff myself. To be honest it's pretty cheap anyway - about 15 quid for a pot that lasts ages. But that might also be something other people would consider if thinking about whether to get an appointment.
Anyway that's it. I've always taken great comfort from being able to go on these forums from time to time, even if just as a reader - and promised myself I'd post up if I ever found something that really worked for me (or share any other useful stuff, e.g. about medications I've tried etc).
This stuff is not the be all and end all, but it has made my anxiety more bearable, and I hope maybe it can help others too.
Wishing everyone really good luck with cracking it, in whichever way works for you.
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