medication advice

[HVC]

Yes Cathy that sounds so familiar to me.. when I have experienced real issues to worry about in my life... my divorce.. the death of my father .. I seemed to cope ok and kept going.. its when I stop and things are too quiet (like holiday periods when I'm not working) Suppose thats the time I dwell on how I'm feeling and analyzise things too much ??

I've been really tired today, yawning constantly.. but kept going ...

I went shopping to, but instead of going into my own town I travelled a bit further and went into a busy area.. to challenge me a bit. I to did ok, I love looking around Home Sense and it really distracted me, so all in all a good day

Hubby home at 6:30 so it will be nice to have someone to talk to.. and then another cup of Horlicks and hopefully a good sleep.. I will let you know x hope you have a relaxing evening Cathy
Helen xx

[cathy s]

Hi
Well done for challenging yourself!

I can't stop yawning too!
Cathy

[HVC]

Hi Cathy,

Have you uppped to the 20mg yet ? How have you been feeling ?

Helen x

[cathy s]

Hi Helen

I haven't upped yet no, have you?

Today I've been feeling really lazy, haven't done much at all. Hope I feel a bit more active next week. Getting bored with wordsearch and su-doku! Couldn't be bothered to excercise either! Think I feel better for the rest.

I've been thinking about why I got like this again. Are you just accepting it as part of life? I'm not sure how to proceed; more self help or get on with other things in life and try to forget it all. If I do the self help I think of it more and get worse - I think I just answered my own question!

You okay?

Cathy

[raven61]

hi, i was on citalopram for several years and found insomnia a problem which i solved by using cannabis! (not to be recommended)

i have recently switched to mirtazapine which does make you drowsy in the evenings (although atm my anxiety is not helping it work), so that is an option if you can't get along with citalopram

hope this helps

[HVC]

Hi Cathy,

Sometimes its good to give your body the rest.. although I did manage the gym yesterday, my plans to clean by sons bedroom went out the window in the afternoon and I just lazed and watched a film. My husband came home about 6:30 so I got on with making a nice meal.

I to have tried to analize as to why this has come on me this year like this... possibly seeing my mother have a panic before Christmas started me off, maybe because I hadn't been to the gym since Nov and was eating a load of rubbish.. who knows. What I have learnt over the years that dwelling on things can bring it back, it could be just a memory of it..and thats why after this bout I'm just going to get on with it..


The only thing I have ahead of me is getting over my fear of going on holiday again. I haven't been back abroad since my bad panic attack out in Portugal in 2008 and don't know how best to tackle this one... its not like riding a bike or facing other phobias as its going to be a blinking expensive one if I fly out and have to fly right back !! maybe I will seek help on this one but who ?? I did fly out to Scotland in Feb 2008 though to get married, I was on Cit at the time, and had no concerns about being away from home that time, so being on the meds may just do it for me, fingers crossed.

Feeling a little anxious this morning.. just keep thinking.. its the meds and I'm going to get better. My plans are to clean the car this morning (the gym is shut). Not such a good sleep last night woke with a nightmare, it didn't help my mum phoned at about 10:30 when we were falling off to sleep asking if she could stay with me tomorrow night. My husband a police officer and is working tonight, my son is still in his dads so I was planning an evening on my own, I want to help her but don't really want an evening of talking about THIS !!

I intend to up the dose on Sunday.. I'm just going to go for it... and except it will still be a week or more before I'm feeling OK. I've had a headache for the last 3 days and aching shoulders its probably all the tension.

How are you feeling today ? xx

[HVC]

Thanks for the advice Raven, I have taken Cit before and it proved to be a success at that time.. whats happening now is I'm only now getting it back into my system, and like so many people I am having a bit of a bumpy ride during the first couple of weeks. It happened last time (which was the first time I took it) so I'm no so worried and worked up about it this time around as I know it will do the trick soon enough and get me back to my old self again .

thanks
Helen

[cathy s]

Hi Helen

I got married in Scotland too! Aviemore, 11 years ago. It's lovely in Scotland isn't it. Were you on 20 when you went there? The last time I went on holiday was August, we visited Mum & Dad who live in France. Unfortunatly the flight made me feel sick and my youngest son got really bad asthma and allergies while there so it was stressfull! Consequently I was terrified on te flight home and wonder if I can ever enjoy a holiday there again! (Something bad has happened nearly every time we've been there! - but that's just unfortunate circumstances.) The best holiday I've had in years was camping in Wales actually. Anglesey (we have family there too). I started off anxious but told myself I just needed time to adjust from the preparation and drive (from sussex) and the change of surroundings. I got on with relaxing and visiting all the wonderfull places there and soon found myself relaxed and enjoying myself. It's the only holiday in years that I felt I could have stayed longer. I wonder what made you panic in Portugal (I have family there too! I know - the coincidences are getting freaky!!) I think you'll be fine on holiday if it's somewhere you really want to be, you can properly relax and take time to get used to the new surroundings. And I'm certain if you're on meds you'll defnately be fine.
You're really keeping busy well done. Interesting about your Mum, sounds like she's having trouble too. I can understand that you don't want to talk about this if you're trying to get on with things and forget about it! I hope you can find a way of enjoying each others time in another way.
I had a terrible headache for 2 days early on, but paracetamol worked okay.

I'm still in the mood of wanting to 'fix' myself. I'm having a hard time accepting you just have to roll with the punches. People keep telling me my mind works overtime, that makes me exhausted, I'm not aware of the build-up, then after lots of things happen and then go quiet I crash. My question to myself is - Can I stop my mind working overtime or am I just like this? From what you've said you have a similar thing. What job do you do?
Also, weirdly I feel if there is no worry or anxiety, life will be a bit dull, what do I replace it with. I have to get used to it I know.

Sorry for going on! Just nice to think aloud!

Hope you enjoy your Mums visit, and get a better nights sleep tonight.

Cathy

[HVC]

Hi Cathy,

We are so alike. I know excactly we you are coming from with regards to your thought process, my mind is always on overdrive. I work in Local Authority Administration and love organisation ..both in work and out... like everything to be in the right place ! I don't have a stressful job (but don't sit around drinking tea all day as some would have you believe!! lol) .. I enjoy my job but most importantly the company, they are a group of people I've worked with for years (been there 22 years now) and we have a laugh. I think having a laugh is so important and when I'm not "as I am now" I love taking mic and teasing people. I worry less than I use to... especially since loosing two very close people in the last few years(my dad and my aunt, who was like a mum to me) and realising some things are totally out of our control anyway!

I was married to my first husband for 14 years (before he had an affair 4 years ago) and his family lived out in Spain. The majority of our hols were taken visiting the family and I guess I built up my confidence visiting there.. although we did go to other places. With my agrophoiba is helped that my ex always use to hire a car, so in my mind I knew I would never be far from the airport should I need to come home.. Portugal was different, it was with my new husband and son, totally new circumstances, ..its difficult to explain but I felt like I was inbetween them (even though they get on great) trying to keep them both happy.

I was on 20mg when we went to Scotland. We got married in Drumen which is close by to Loch Lomand it was beautiful and the people were very warm and friendly. My husband (new husband) and I were engaged over 20 years ago (when I was 21) but we broke up, we were too immature (well him more than me being a man!), went our seperate ways, both married other people, he had two boys and I had one, he divorced 2006 and me in 2007 and we bumped into eachother in our local COOP and arranged a date.. the rest as they say is history.

I've gone on a bit Cathy.. but it is good for us to talk and will help us in our healing process x

speak soon, have a good night and Happy New Year in advance of tomorrow xx

[cathy s]

Hi Helen

I'm quite jealous of your long standing job and collegues. I sometimes wish I had carried on work (insurance claims) after maternity leave 11 years ago. It seems to have had a very positive effect on many women I know to keep their hand in.

Thanks for sharing a bit about your life, it's really interesting - a nice love story!

My husband & I met about 15 years ago in a club, had an on and off time for a year and then committed ourselves to getting a flat together which sealed our relationship. Two years later we had a son, followed by our second two and a half years after that.

Happy New Year! Have a good evening.

Cathy X