Guy's advice needed...Well, unless ladies have something to chip in!

[mercer88]

How does the expression go...

"Jack of all trades..."

[shoegal]

Jack of what?

[mercer88]

If I were not a naive young man I would suggest that was flirtatious!

...Possibly...It could be that the winky face gave it away.

I, missy, am a Jack of all trades. I can Jack anything to a proficient degree. When it comes to Jacking, there are few better than I! Whether it be houseplant murder, or gynaecology, I can Jack it without issue!

[shoegal]

Thank goodness you didn't mistype 'winky face' then...

[mercer88]

I am a gentleman well versed in the type of face insinuated by your innuendo, and as such, could not possibly confuse the two...

Were a man to pull that face under such circumstances I would suggest he call an ambulance, chances are it is a stroke...


...Ok, even the word stroke seems dirty now...I swear you have corrupted my mind woman!

[shoegal]

Says he... after imagining that Alice In Wonderland was a buxom blonde and after discussing his rubber burns...

[mercer88]

You have an irritatingly good memory...

Ok...I was corrupted a long time ago! but it seems you are just the same, despite your innocent stories about reading and kicking the dog out of the bed (quite what you're doing in the bed that you feel the need for privacy for I cannot say; merely speculate! )

Anyway, are you that much of an insomniac, such as I, that you are not enjoying the gentle caress of sleep's sweet dreams on your beautiful slumbering body? Rather than bringing up my fantasies about magically conjuring nubile young blondes for my own physical amusement!

[shoegal]

I never said I needed privacy... I think that's your imagination running wild again! I don't need privacy from the dog if that's what you mean, I just have to shove him out of the way because he hogs all the duvet despite him being rather small!

I am not enjoying the sweet caress of sleeps gentle dreams yet (oh you do have a way with words) but I'm going to pour myself a glass of wine and then I'm going to snuggle up under the duvet and read my book until I pass out. So night night, speak to you soon I hope.

And no naughty thoughts while I'm gone. Tut tut.

P.S. I'm blonde.

[mercer88]

No naughty thoughts! With my filthy, corrupted brain!? Impossible...and as for you being blonde, now you are just teasing!

Sleep well. Pleasant dreams missy.

[Greenman50]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NNC0kIzM1Fo