Another Breast one :-(

[Mogwog]

Hi

I have had breast cancer fear since I found a lump in my breast in Aug 2009 - it was a benign lump. I found another in April 2010 which was a cyst and another in Oct 2010 which was again another cyst.

Well am now OBSESSED with checking my left breast for lumps (this is the one all the lumps have been in) I then comapre to the right breast and it isn't as lumpy which scares me. I am absolutely convined that I have breast cancer. I'm 28, 29 in a month.

Is it ok to have one lumpy breast even if you can't feel the lumps on the other side?

The lumps I can feel in my left breast all feel the same - there isn't one that stands out as different from the rest - just that I can't feel the same lump on the other breast.

I am on fluoxetine 20mg a day and have been for 5 weeks now.

I just don't know what to to - I actually hate my boobs, I really really do. I am scared I am going to die and leave my disabled son.

Anyone have lumps in one breast that they don't have in the other and how do you not worry about them?

Thank you

L.xxx

[mum-of-4]

Hi there

I can totally sympathise with you. I am OBSSESED with checking my breasts and my left breast is definately more lumpy than the right. I have just been to the drs this morning because of pain in my left breast and lumpiness. She assures me that there is nothing there and that the lumpiness that I can feel is just tissue. I hate my boobs too. I have 4 kids and worry constantly that something is wrong with me and I won't be around to see them grow up. Also, my boobs feel more lumpy when i am ovulating and also when I'm on my period. Dr said it's hormonal and normal.
Obviously if you find a definate lump you should always have it check out for reasurrance but you've had a few now and they've all turned out fine.
This Health Anxiety is driving me nuts

Just wanted to let you know you're not alone.

[Mogwog]

Thank you for your reply - its horrible isn't it :-(

I have a Drs appt in a week to for a review because of my antidepressants. I'm going to ask her to check my breast for me.

I just can't seem to get over this fear and I don't really have a clue what I am feeling for when checking my breasts. I am half tempted just to stop checking them as I cannot cope with this fear but then I worry that I won't detect something in its early stages.

I can't sleep or eat properly - am very short tempered and very tearful.
Logically I know I should only check them just after my period - which I finished 11 days ago so I could be ovulating now.

I 've just had enough - I really have.

[Anxious_gal]

I am actually scared to check my breasts in case find a lump.....
But I know if I did find a lump I would be worried until someone could prove to me it wasn't cancer.
aw thats good your comfortable enough with your doctor to have her check.
I would be interested to know the out come.

It's awful when the anxiety takes over.

[Mogwog]

Thanks fot your reply Mishel.

I had another feel this morning as my breast is feeling quite uncomfortable and I am worrying about a lump that feels like a ridge in the bottom of my breast, there isn't one in the same location on the right breast :-( its kind of an oval shape, I can't really describe it very well.

I am so sick of breast lumps.

Any other stories experiences will be most welcome.

Thanks.xxxx

[merrysee]

hi Mogwog, i too am having breast problems at the moment, just over a week ago i found a lump on the outer side of my left breast, i went for a scan last night at a breast clinic, told it was a swollen lymph gland, she said she was 90%-95% sure, but i had to having a biopsy and return next week for the results, the thought of waiting a whole week just totally fills me with horror, i'm convinced it's the big C word, i am recently married with 2 small children and i keep imagining leaving them without a mummy, i'm a total mess, completely understand the worry your going through, this illness is the latest one in a long list of problems i've convinced myself i have, anxiety has played a massive part of my life for the last year, i never believe the doctors when they tell me all the symptoms i have are anxiety related, and i've had every symptom you can think of lately, no one seems to listen to you, all doctors want to do is freeze your brain with pills, it's nice to know that we're all in this mess together.
Thinking of you, Mel. xx

[Mogwog]

Hi Mel

Thanks for your reply. So pleased its a lymph node - yay. I also have one there as I had a lump removed from my breast (benign) and my node swelled up, its gone down now but never to its orignal size - so you are not alone in having a node there!!

I am still crapping myself but realize its all out of my hands. I have a lump and I just have to deal with it and get it checked out - going out of my mind is not going to change anything. I say this now but I bet I have a bit of a wobble later and get all tearful again.

Message me if you ever want to have a chat.

Laura.xxxxx