no replies, xxx

[Ammeg]

ok im sure alex just posted??!!!!!

[Alexandra]

Yeah i did my comp had a fit (flippin gremlins)

I do'nt agree with naming people on the forum either

Just wanted to say the same as everyone else & thats what Nicola mentioned before just to send a polite pm if a poster has'nt replyed back to their post.

Take Care

Alex

Many People Will Walk
In & Out Of Your Life
But Only True Friends
Will Leave Footprints
In Your Heart

[vernon]

Hi alex, nice to see you again, you are right in the naming part, But I have had anxieties for years too and last year was at one of my worst with eye surgery problems, being registered blind, and stopping drink after 40 years I was realy the worst i think i had ever been, But I was so glad of the support I receive from people on this site and without there help and lots of private messages (including you) I would never have had the surgery which gave me back some site nor would I have got through my bad anxiety spell, and had to say thanks at the least. Take care all. Vernon

[clickaway]

I just want to say that I think most of understand that we react in certain ways here because of our anxiety, and is great that people on this site are so non-judgemental.

For one who has bottled up emotions for nearly 50 years, I know how important it is to open up and vent your anger and frustration. I still struggle with that when it comes to angst, criticism etc. I think many of us here want to be cared for and loved as much as possible and so tend to be 'nice' to others more than the norm.

Its more than OK for people to vent anger and frustration, and even if it upsets someone else, I'm not going to be too hard on anyone, even if I do feel there was a misjudgement. We progress through life as a result of these.

And xxx, if you are reading this, a big hug to you!



Ray
http://www.anxietyrelease.org.uk/

And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance, I hope you dance.
~Mark Sanders and Tia Sillers

[tattybear]

Hi Vern,

Whilst I do agree with you with regards to acknowlegments, you posted a topic on here only the other day with regards to it, so im not quite sure what your trying to achieve by posting again about the same topic AND publically naming somone.

We all come here as we have various issues / problems. I know when I was very depressed, I wasnt in the right frame of mind, so acknowledhing a post wasnt alwasy a priority.

Some people come on here and feel panicked etc, and want reassurance, and this is a great place to come for that, lets not start singling people out and humiliating them by nameing them for the whole forum to see - what is that achieving , other than making that person feel worse? Surly thats not what this is about.

Yes, an acknowledgement is only polite after people do go to the trouble of replying - but lets not also forget how the other person feels.

We all have the choice to reply to posts.

We all share thoughts, tips etc in the hope of helping each other through.

I know that if i reply to a post, I dont do it just to get a thank you - I do it as I know where people are coming from on certain issues. I have offered my advice / help and it is there for them to read and hopfully help them through. A thank you is a bonus - a lttle cherry on the cake - its not law.

Come on guys, lets not get away from the real point of this forum - we're all here to help and support each other. Dont take things personally if you dont get a thank you, just accept it, And les not make people feel any worse than they do coming on here by naming them.

..............GROUP HUG!! (((((((((((( NMP ))))))))))))))))))))







Tatty B xx

[nomorepanic]

Wow - we always find that posts like this provoke a response and this has been read 270 times today and xxx is not even amongst those that have read it!

One of the reasons I left the forum for a break was because I was on melt down helping people and never knowing whether I was or not. I reply to PM's and emails as well as this forum and if I don't get feedback then I find it both disheartening and in the end I have to say annoying.

xxxmay be guilty of this and have her reasons but I think the problem goes beyond just one person and is much more about someone just saying a simple "thanks" or "ok i read your reply".

It is tiring to invest time in replying and never even knowing if the person read the replies so I can see the frustration amongst people and I too am guilty of thinking "sod it then I won't reply again".

That is human nature and people don't necessarily want to be praised and thanked continually, they just want to know that maybe (just maybe) they made a small difference to someone's day by posting a reply.

What we find happen is that less and less people reply to someone who won't acknowledge them and this is not because they don't care but because we just simply "give up" as we want feedback from that person.

Anyway I am waffling now but I don't think Vern meant this to be personal against xxx- it was about loads of members on here but xxx came to mind as he had taken time to reply and we all remember who we replied to and who didn't say anything in response to this.

I am sure it will blow over and we will be happy bunny's again !


Nicola

[tara]

QUOTE:That is human nature and people don't necessarily want to be praised and thanked continually, they just want to know that maybe (just maybe) they made a small difference to someone's day by posting a reply.


I agree with this nicola, it is nice to know you may have made things a little easier for someone during their bad time, i know the replies i had to my post yesturday really helped me a lot, and it's nice to know people have been there or to reasure me that i'm only human, or that it will pass, so thank all who replied to me. Tara xx

Hoping not offend anyone with this post ok

[vernon]

Thank you Nicola, as you know I really didn’t single xxx out it was just an example of one whom never even answered a question I asked her on replying to her post. I have also notice that people are not getting as many replies to posts as they where say a year ago and I know this is because people are giving people advice who ask for it then no acknowledgment, no acknowledgement night even mean the person is not even reading the reply; I have spoke to lots of people who don’t even bother to reply anymore because of no acknowledgment.

[mico]

The way I see it, is that Vern's 'outburst' was most probably nothing more than a perfect psychological example of the emotions travelling through the mind of the average human being not receiving acknowledgement for their efforts.

Should xxx reply in anger, then that would be also be a perfect psychological example of the emotions travelling through the mind of the average human being having just been criticised for their message forum etiquette.

Keep in that context and there's no actual argument, just an array of natural human emotions unravelling on a message forum in a somewhat interesting display of human nature. Then we can all be friends again since neither side is wrong, just feeling their emotions

'Security is mostly superstition. It does not exist in nature, nor do the children of men as a whole experience it. Avoiding Danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing.'

[vernon]

Very wll put Mico, Maybe I should have waited for a while before posting then maybe no name would have been used. (it wasnt in no way meant to offend xxx I love everyone and love to think I can help people) I know for a fact so many people get anoyed with no acnowledgment, I also know people have stopped posting becouse of it. I was just saying what lots where thinking, But should have thought first and sain no names. I am sure xxx is a very nice person and hope I havnt upset her by using her as an example