i need real help,people dont like me

[katexxxx]

hi ,sorry if this is a bit off topic but i just wanna ask something,
basically im an anxious person and its effecting my relationship with people,like i always feel people dont really like being around me or that people dont like me.at all my old work places i have felt the same,people have their groups and im just not part of them.
i dont have many freinds because i find it hard socializing,like our freind came round and was just talking to my other freind and not me...so im guessing people just find me boring.i dont know why i just dont find the things they find funny to be funny to me,id rather be at home with my dog and cat,but its just not healthy anymore,can someone give me advice please.
its depressing now

[Kate21]

hi kate,
I'm feeling like this alot too at the moment I can relate to what you are saying about work places and not feeling part of anyones group, even though I have friends at work I feel like I'm boring because i'm worrying all the time, I feel very paranoid at work and think people think negative thoughts about me all the time.
The thing is I know they are probably not thinking about me at all.
Just keep telling yourself that people do not think negatively about you.
Other than that I can't give much advice other than your not alone and if you find any good coping methods please let me know! :-) x

[Tyke]

Hi Kate & Kate

I know exactly what you mean. Some work places are not very welcoming and folk there can be really cliquey. I think it helps if you have been somewhere a long time, but even then it is still harder if you are an anxious quieter type. I know I must seem boring to may people as I don't have a life anywhere near as active as what they often seem to, but I do my own thing and try not to let it bother me.

My advice would be to try and develop your own interests a little. This could be anything from doing classes to joining a group of some sort. Katexxxx - you are clearly an animal lover, so could you do something along those lines? You could even do voluntary work for an animal charity. Anything that brings you into contact with people who may have a similar interest is worth a go. If there is a local group for anxiety sufferers you could try joining that as well. Other people going through similar things are likely to be much more understanding and less likely to exclude you.

You don't have to be the life and soul of the party. You just need to aim for a situation where you have a social life you feel happy with. Remember other people often feel 'boring' too - you are not alone! Hope I haven't sent you to sleep!

Tyke