How do I cope

[silentcalligraph]

Brill

One of the worst effects of depression is that it destroys all feelings of self-worth and self-esteem. I used to refer to myself as 'walking failure'... Maybe you feel like you have to fight and you don't have the strength now and then you'll add that as another failure to the list - talk about a vicious circle. Try to relax and observe your mind when the depression-program (as I call it) kicks in - tell yourself 'this is depression at work - it's not a reflection of reality', don't allow depression to define you. You're a loving and caring father and husband (otherwise you wouldn't worry so much about your family, you wouln't post here expressing gratitude and offering help to others) despite the depression and agoraphobia. Crying in your situation is not a weakness but a sign of strength and emotional power, take hope from your tears!

[brill]

Wow thanks I will say that all the posts have been very helpfull and uplifting.today is not a real good day.But I will try and put some of the advice given to me into practice,I,m going to do some spring cleaning (although it,s almost winter hear lol)and try to think about all the good things in my life.I will also start putting entries into my diary again.
Being in such a negitave stat of mind I hope they all do work,I.ll only try to do a little bit today but will try to do a bit every day
Well thanks again.There is so many questions I want answered but one at a time ha.

Thanks again BRILL.

Never give up
Never give in
Life,s to short
Make it last
Brill

[brill]

Hello all It,s been a couple of days.

I feel a little bit better today, I have been taking your advice and doing some housework,keeping myself busy.It also feels good having a clean house.I think the new med,s I,m on are starting to work,and the sideaffects are starting to weare off.I have reopened my diary and started putting entrys into it.and my wife and I sat down and talked about all the good things in my life and beleve it or not there are still a lot.

I am by no means better but like kate says I feel as if a small light hase been turned on in my dark tunnel.And the biggest help has been all of the good posts in this forum,So i say thankyou so very much.

Thankyou all BRILL.
I by no means feel well but like

Never give up
Never give in
Life,s to short
Make it last
Brill

[brill]

Oh boy I woke up to a bad day today I feel like sitting around and feel sorry for myself lol.I think tyredness has a part to play in my mood to.

brill

Never give up
Never give in
Life,s to short
Make it last
Brill

[uryjm]

Hi Brill
Sorry you're feeling so low. I know tiredness certainly affects my moods, and I'm more vulnerable to anxiety when I'm tired. Dealing with these symptoms day after day is mentally exhausting, so it's not surprising that your defences wear down. I think it's important not to be too hard on yourself and accept that you're allowed off days. You'll come through them and you will feel better. I'd also echo the sentiments above about exercise, where a good vigourous walk in the fresh air can lift your spirits. Good luck.

Jim

[Lottie32]

Hi Brill

I was depressed and didn't even know it!!!!

I thought I was just suffering from Xmas stress - but it didn't go after Xmas!!!

I had a terrible time over Xmas and the New Year, and had to force myself to join in with anything.

I spent Xmas Eve in tears, and cried for no reason on most days over the holidays. Nic and Meg will remember one Sunday evening when I was really bad and couldn't get onto the forum or chat room (thanks for your help guys)

Eventually Amanda my CBT counsellor suggested that I had depression and wrote a letter to my GP.

She was very good, and within a short space of time I was taking fluoxetine.

I had always coped without drugs before, but I felt so bad, I thought I'd just give it a try.

HOWEVER, I realised that drugs weren't the ANSWER - so I did some research, wrote my article on depression (see the Home Page).

Basically, I have worked hard and I have done everything on the list of suggestions!!!! (Yes I know that there are loads!!!)

Its been tough, sometimes I thought I'd never conquer it, but I have.

I feel "sunny" inside again. I've still got a long way to go of course, but I feel SOOOOOOO much better, I reallly do.

I know that by working really hard, when I stop taking the fluoxetine, I will still be able to carry on with my life. The medication has just given me the energy to tackle the problem head on.

Please give it a go. I'm afraid I was really sceptical, and that nobody on the site could understand - the advice that they gave me just didn't seem enough to do any good - eating nuts, taking fish oil and keeping a diary will cure depression - I mean please!!!!

BUT IT HELPS SO MUCH

Now I feel so much better, it's quite difficult to write about this without people thinking that you are being smug, or lecturing, so I hope you don't think this - I'm still struggling, just feeling so much better, and I can see the light at the end of the tunnel!

If you are having problems with medication, have you thought of taking SJW or 5HTP?

Everytime you have a negative thought - make yourself think two good ones!!!!!

Really you should have the advantage living in Oz - my mate now lives there, and he loves his adopted country. He is never coming home, and one day when I can fly, I am going over to visit him!

I'm feeling a bit low this morning (I'm tired and got lots to do), it's grey outside, there are still only a few trees with leaves on, it's raining, windy and cold. Let me tell you - some sun makes it much easier to fight back!!!!!! (LOL)

Keep going Brill, you will get there, you are already adopting the right attitiude, and it sounds like you have some good support behind you at home too!!

Take care


Charlie

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger.

[brill]

Been really bad latley.trying to cope with all in my life is getting to hard and is getting me really down. :(

[red]

Hi Brill
Really sorry to hear that you are having a bad time lately, it's not easy is it darling?

Remember the thought patterns Brill - even if you don't feel like what you want and where you want to be are realistic at this time, just by thinking about good future events rather than how you feel now really does work. It is oh so easy to slip back into our somehow 'inbuilt' way of thinking, even if we are the most positive people on earth - I know it gets me like that and I am super positive most of the time. Mail me if you feel I can help you with this Brill, I don't mind at all and am here for you like I guess everybody on this site is.

Take care

Red
x

[silentcalligraph]

Hi Brill

Sorry it's not going so well right now. Unfortunately this can happen and it's tough, just when you think you're on your way back into normalcy (whatever that's supposed to mean) you'll get knocked off your feet once more. There's no magic cure, it's hard and painful - but it's worth the fight. And remember to be gentle - be gentle towards yourself and all those around you. The first step is to ignore the self-abuse. Some people say you have to make it stop but sometimes those voices within just won't shut up - ignore them instead. Break out of the vicious circle you're in by just going on - no heroic acts required. Make somebody smile, do something that makes you feel better - have a look at nature's beauty - here's a place to start with: http://www.its.caltech.edu/~atomic/s...tos/photos.htm

Be gentle and take care!

[brill]

Thanks Red and sil your words are very welcomed,and the photos are beutifull.Red I may take you up on your offer thanks.

My problem is at the moment I have got so much bad things going on in my life it hard not to get down about it.And some time I take my frustration out on others which upsets me also.I try but it is hard to see a positive future in all of this.

Thanks for your words and support.

BRILL

Never give up
Never give in
Life,s to short
Make it last
Brill