Firstly thankyou to all who replied to my post about CPN [:X]
I was so worried and scared,but I feel so relieved the lady I saw was nice it was for an assessment to see which treatment would be best.
At first she suggested group therapy I said no I would just clam up thinking no-one would want to hear my troubles.
Her main concern was my anxiety and agrophobia until she said what was your childhood like[?]
My partner said well thats where it all comes from[V]
I explain my stepfather had abused me then came back to live with us after serving 6 months.He is still in our family now and because I didnt want my daughter to go me and mum no longer speak.
She asked if I ever recieved any councilling,NO it was all about my older sister,I was just the "Tell Tale" (he used to call me that all the time:()
I still feel like the bad one who couldn't hold my tongue.It was all my fault for tearing the family apart,my sister was everyones big concern and everyone mad a big fuss.
I do feel that if I learn to like myself again everything else will come back on its own.At the minute if my own family dont like me why should anyone else:(
I need to understand how a mum can put a man that did that over her daughter and grand daughter.
feeling quiet possitive for now xxxxxxxxxxxxx
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