Hello all!
I posted this earlier on a different thread, but I wanted to share my recent experiences with what I hope is just a case of severe anxiety-induced BFS . . .
About 6 weeks ago, I started feeling a tingling/numbing in my left hand. Then, within a few days it spread to my whole arm, then my left leg, then the right one, and finally, to my right arm, although with much less intensity. I also started to feel cramps and aches, primarily in my lower back, left shoulder, and legs but also occasionally in my arms and hands. As I have to walk around a lot because of my job, I did notice that the pain/cramps got more intense as the day went on, to the point that I was really sore by the end of the day.
I then went and asked Dr. Google what I might have, and of course, I found the Big One that we all are terrified of having. The more I read about it, the more convinced I became that I had it and that I was done for . . .
I went to the doctor's to rule out any other diseases. I've suffered from food poisoning a few times before, and the symptoms are actually very similar, so I had blood work to see if that was the cause again. All blood work was negative for pretty much anything. He said I was in good health but referred me to a cardiologist just in case, though. My brother has a heart condition, so the cardio did an EKG and found that my heart was perfectly fine. Both Drs. prescribed pain pills and anti-inflammatory meds to reduce the pain and stuff. It didn't really work at all. As days went on, it became very difficult to sleep because I would suddenly wake up and notice that either arm or leg was numb and very difficult to move at first, and then I was able to move it just fine, with only a little pain/discomfort.
I went to a different Dr. who prescribed antibiotic shots in case the blood work had been a false negative for food poisoning (it has happened before), given my medical history with it. The shots hurt a lot, but I did notice a slight reduction in my pain for a few days. Still, the symptoms would show up randomly and grow, peak, and then subside, like some sort of evil roller coaster.
The next stop was the neurologist. I described my symptoms to him, and he seemed quite alarmed. He did a basic reflex test, asked me to follow his pen with my eyes, asked me to extend my arms, legs, and hands, etc. After saying that it all seemed normal, he recommended I got a brain and cervical MRI. I got the results, and he said everything was fine in the brain, but he did notice a slight compression on my top cervicals, mentioning that while it would account for some of the pain, it really wasn't enough of a problem to manifest itself like it was. He told me he had suspected MS, but ruled that out after seeing the MRI. No mention of the Big One from him at all, btw, so I didn't bring it up myself. He suggested it was all anxiety/stress and suggested that I visit a psychologist. (Full disclaimer: I still haven't because I was a psych major in college . . .)
As all of this was going on, I kept reading about the Big One and its symptoms. I didn't really experience fascs at first, but as I read more and more, I started noticing them, little by little. I've had eyelid twitches before, and I always found them annoying, but they usually went away on their own after a few days/weeks. Not now. Every now and then, my left arm also goes a bit crazy. Or my left thigh. Or my right arm. The point is, they started popping up pretty much everywhere, even my butt and chest . . . It's nothing too intense and only happens occasionally, but I still get uncomfortable at having them especially when they wake me up at night because then I can't sleep after that.
However, the fascs still made me uneasy, and I still felt like something else might be lurking underneath . . . I became terrified of the late stage symptoms, primarily the inability to breathe. I then started to notice that I felt like I wasn't breathing properly and started to yawn constantly but not really pull in any air, if that makes sense. I would panic and had to create a routine of breathing/relaxation exercises to help the episodes subside, which would normally take anything from a few minutes to even an hour. I also found that chewing gum, speaking, singing (I'm somewhat of a musician), or keeping my mind occupied in general makes that seemingly go away, until I remember it, then it starts all over. I also had perceived weakness in my arms and legs. I started to test my strength during the day at random, from doing calf raises, to push-ups, and everything seems fine. I can walk around just fine unless I happen to have a cramp (no stumbling/falling down, though), but thankfully, no signs of clinical weakness up until now, which is why I haven't gone in to get an EMG done. I tell myself that I won't unless I see something more severe happen to avoid giving myself more even more anxiety . . .
Luckily, I found this forum and a very helpful post about the Big One (by someone I think goes by fishman?) He provided a testimonial from someone who has it and it went a long way toward calming me. Apparently, pain and tingling aren't really early or primary symptoms related to it, so once I internalized that, I was able to achieve some calm for a while. Also, reading posts where people share their experiences in a positive environment has helped a lot too.
My tingling and numbness are still there, but in a much lesser degree compared to how it started. It's mainly only in my hands and feet. The cramps and pain are also still there, but like I said, they usually only get really nasty if I have to walk around too much . . . the fascs and the breathing thing are also still there and have become my primary focus for now. All in all, I'm pretty sure it's just BFS, but the fear and anxiety of having something more severe is with me constantly . . .
One last thing that I definitely feel is worth mentioning: I recently went through a major negative emotional experience in my life, and, while it really hurt, I didn't really grieve outwardly in the sense that I didn't cry, or felt down about it too much. Maybe my body found a way to deal with it in its own way . . .
I wrote a book, so thank you if you read all of this. I would like to hear what you guys might think, or share/talk about any details that you think might relate to your own experiences.
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