Hyperawareness DP/DR

[AJwolf1987]

Hello everyone really looking for some help and advice as I’m at my wits end

This started about a week ago , I woke up from my sleep abruptly at 4.30am , for a few seconds it felt like my brain was jammed or stuck and I panicked who am I where am I ? What’s going on

Anyway since then it’s allost as if I’ve been dropped into my body and I’m realising I’m alive for the first time . I’m constantly plagued by hyperawarenss if everything I do say and think like the whole concept of being real and thinking and here and seeing from my perspective is totally new . I’m really mentally fatigued I’m so tired all the time and just want a break from myself and my joints and feelings but the only break I get is the 5 or so hours sleep a night I get .

I’m taking Mitazapine and Quietapine (45 and 225) I’m tapering the quietapine down very slowly as my doc and a couple of other mental health people seem to think the quietapine enduced this . I’m 31 and I’ve never felt like this before

Has anyone else ever had this ? Tips and advice please I just want to go back to a normal life

[al_pk]

Hi AJwolf,

I can fully sympathise with your situation. I had a very similar episode earlier this year and because of DPDR I got flung into this very wierd state of mind which felt like hyperawareness at the time (that was a keyword I was constantly googling), but I really began to feel triggered by basically the whole concept of being alive and my own consciousness. It's nightmare stuff. I've come to understand mine not as hyperawareness but as an existential crisis.

You won't like this but it has been with me 24/7 for over 6 months now. The crippling anxiety has left me but my thoughts have just not returned to normal, and I feel very wierd about time, concioussness, my feelings and many things that have bothered me ever since then. Like you it all began with a huge panic attack in the early hours in about late April this year.

My advice, from someone who failed to do this, would be to not try and force yourself to feel 'normal' again. Secondly, get on with your daily life and keep your autopilot going as strong as possible, you've got to not let it impress on you as much as possible. Thirdly, bump up those 5 hours to 8. Again you might not like this but the chances of you waking up tommorow and feeling normal after something like this are slim to none. You're already fatigued and drained, and you need to put your mind and body in recovery mode now.

[AJwolf1987]

Really wish I could bump up the sleep I take my meds about 10 and sleep til about 4.30/5 but I’m tired all day probably “brain fog” so sorry you are going through this as well no it’s not comforting what you said but it’s good to know I’m not alone

[al_pk]

Do you mind me asking what you are diagnosed with? I have a very similar meds routine of mirtazipine and olanzapine but I will say I only really started improving and getting my sleep back when I was prescribed diazepam 3 months ago, and which I take twice daily. I basically need horse levels of sedation but whatever it takes.

I managed to track down some veterans of this type of condition through NMP and I will say that insomnia is always accompanying stuff like this. From the people I've spoken to it also seems to go in stages: rough period > learning to cope > normal life. I'm currently straddling between the first and second

It has been a long ride for me but nothing is forever, and I have improved in imperceptible ways that cumulate to make a big difference.

Al

[AJwolf1987]

Iriganlky a phobia with anxiety / depression and panic attacks. I really hope I can make it into recovery as every day is a marathon for me . I was prescribed some diazepam by the doc but she only gave me 2mg tabs and even taking 2 did nothing I’d probably need something like 10/15 . I am very slowly trying to taper off quietapine and hoping for a meds review to change as apart from letting me sleep for a few hours I’ve not gotten any better in the meds .

Veterans of this ? Could you point me in their direction maybe they have some tips

[al_pk]

I also had anxiety, depression and panic attacks, and some strange phobias and i know EXACTLY how you feel when you say every day is a marathon. Yes doctors typically withhold higher levels of diazepam as it can be addictive, but 2mg seems pointless. I was on 15mg, now tapered down to 10mg, 5 if I'm feeling up to it but that's been one or two days.

I can't officially recommend this but I ordered my own diazepam when I felt the doctors were tapering down too quickly. To be frank, they are not always empathetic to what is going on. I knew how much i needed and it gave me the spaced to begin recovery.

Recovery isn't an if but a when and you might start feeling a lot better in weeks with the right strategy. The individuals I found aren't active anymore but one man in particular called Carl went through all this. Aside from the specific questions I asked, his main advice was to keep your autopilot going as strong as possible, to not let any positivity be shattered and that recovery will come but in your own timeframe.

I have had DPDR issues in the past and there is no specific moment everything pops back into clarity. But there is a moment where you look back and think "oh yeah, that thing", and realise it is gone. Yours will come too.

---------- Post added at 17:44 ---------- Previous post was at 17:02 ----------

My own personal advice for escaping how you're feeling is to find the thing that occupies your mind when you're awake. For me, it's gaming. But it's personal preference

[Suziewuzie]

This is the most annoying advice & made me want to slap people who suggested it but, you just have to carry on. Don't let yourself think about how you're feeling just tell yourself Well this is it - this is how I feel for the foreseeable future. It DOES pass I promise, it's plagued me for years when my anxiety flares up. The more I think about it the worse it becomes. I find mindfulness practise helps A LOT as it encourages you to get out of autopilot and into what's really going on.

[Dimdim]

Hello everyone really looking for some help and advice as I’m at my wits end

This started about a week ago , I woke up from my sleep abruptly at 4.30am , for a few seconds it felt like my brain was jammed or stuck and I panicked who am I where am I ? What’s going on

Anyway since then it’s allost as if I’ve been dropped into my body and I’m realising I’m alive for the first time . I’m constantly plagued by hyperawarenss if everything I do say and think like the whole concept of being real and thinking and here and seeing from my perspective is totally new . I’m really mentally fatigued I’m so tired all the time and just want a break from myself and my joints and feelings but the only break I get is the 5 or so hours sleep a night I get .

I’m taking Mitazapine and Quietapine (45 and 225) I’m tapering the quietapine down very slowly as my doc and a couple of other mental health people seem to think the quietapine enduced this . I’m 31 and I’ve never felt like this before

Has anyone else ever had this ? Tips and advice please I just want to go back to a normal life

I normally just go with the flow and live, talk with people, go outside, breath air. I've had this multiple times and when I focus on it, it gets worse. But i'd consider my case of derealization pretty minor so it could be different on your end.