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Old 25-01-12, 08:04
RB263 RB263 is offline
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 12
Re: Scared these intrusive thoughts will never go away.

It truly helps to see that others are going through the same things I am. So thank you for the reply, hallam11, I appreciate it
I've been doing better the past week or so, but the thoughts still scare me. It's just the "what if I ____ " and then eventually, I worry that I'm worried about the wrong thing (like I worry I'm more scared of going to jail/being a bad person than actually causing harm to others). Can you relate to that? Because that truly worries and scares me to the core. I just worry one day I'm going to SNAP and become this awful person, or what if I just one day get an urge to harm another person or do a bad thing? Or I'll get these thoughts in my head like "I do want to _____" and it freaks me out. I don't want to go to jail or be a bad person!
That's generally what my thoughts are and it's really scary.
Like I said, I've been doing better. It's still on my mind daily, but I'm doing better at occupying my brain so I'm not dwelling on it.
I'm just scared that I'm pushing it back and it's going to come back and cause anxiety all over again. Ugh. I just wish that thought never popped into my head in the first place!

Do all your thoughts become obsessive? Because for me, not all of them become obsessions. I'll get intrusive thoughts that are disturbing and distressing for a moment, but I don't always become obsessed over them like I have with this one. Is that normal/typical?
Just wondering how other people are.
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Old 25-01-12, 16:25
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petram petram is offline
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Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 272
Re: Scared these intrusive thoughts will never go away.

its exactly how it tends to go i get used the il stab u to death or stab u in the head... then it goes i swear to god i will or i want too.... its like the thoughts get stronger trying to push u back when ur trying to get better , hun sorry hope its not to graphic :(
i dont obsess over the thoughts just have em a million times a day towards every 1 inc all loved ones and strangers in street !!!!
i effing hate it !!

the fact it causes us such distress is def pure o , im waiting for cbt , please god it helps.. im also taking venlafaxine n since increasing the dose from 37.5 mg to 75mg they seem to have been more prominent!! grrrr hoping this fades as the new dose settle sin today i been full of it but coped better , had a rough hour where anxiety crept up with it, but it drives u to tears !!
and dispare sometimes it really does .... keep in touch xx

---------- Post added at 16:25 ---------- Previous post was at 16:18 ----------

oh and 2 docs have told me this is very common this type of harm ocd, and the cbt lady on the phone said i cannot tell u how common this is...... so when ya feeling bad just remeber some 1 behind u somewhere could very well be having the same or simalar thoughts about u too and feeling as knotted up aswell.
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Old 25-01-12, 17:40
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hallam11 hallam11 is offline
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Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 546
Re: Scared these intrusive thoughts will never go away.

Hi RB263,

Yes sometimes I do worry more about going to jail and being a bad person rather than the actual harm to cause. But to me that is a sign that I don't want to actually harm anyone because it shows that really I know I don't want to. I guess that doesn't make much sense. But yes sometimes the worries take different angles. You just need to recognise them as another OCD obsession. The worry that you will just snap one day is something I can definitely relate to and I think a lot of people who suffer from ocd can too. Another one of my worries is that I will do something bad without thinking and it will just happen. I think thats not too possible though because I am hyper aware because of my worries so I doubt that could happen.

No not all my thoughts become obsessive...just some of them! Thats normal too I think for us! Petram is right too, the more you obsess the worse they can get, and the more frequent they tend to get.

When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, "I used everything you gave me." ~Erma Bombeck
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Old 25-01-12, 18:32
clc clc is offline
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Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 191
Re: Scared these intrusive thoughts will never go away.

With me it's the worry I might snap! Do it without realising. What a horrible illness OCD is!! But we are all in it together.
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Old 26-01-12, 08:31
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petram petram is offline
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Re: Scared these intrusive thoughts will never go away.

mine is the constant thoughts of it all!! :( xx
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Old 26-01-12, 09:08
clc clc is offline
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Posts: 191
Re: Scared these intrusive thoughts will never go away.

Definately Petra. We try to think of other things but it doesn't work! I know were not meant to do that but it's so hard just thinking about them all the time!

I have found the seroxat has improved my anxiety so far but the thoughts are still there which feels a bit weird because now it feels like I'm not scared of the thoughts because I don't have the physical feelings!

Hope you are getting on ok with our meds. (btw I switch my meds last week as y doc said the other ones should have been working a bit at least and they weren't)
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Old 17-05-12, 23:16
wee_debs2003 wee_debs2003 is offline
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 13
Re: Scared these intrusive thoughts will never go away.

Hiya everyone,I've been diagnosed with anxiety and depression after getting help when intrusive thought started to take over my life. Mine's were always about self harm and were associated with feeling a failure. So for example thinking about how I didn't finish a task in work would call up an image of me slashing my wrists. It got to the point where I didn't need a trigger anymore and I was constantly imagining stuff in my head. I would walk past a railway line and have a really detailed and vivid picture in my head of walking in front of a train. The key thing,as lots of people have said,is that you know you wouldn't act on them. Just because you can doesn't mean that you will. Same goes for any other unwanted intrusive thoughts. You have to be strong and phsically tell yourself not to worry. I found snapping an elastic band on my wrisy every time these thoughts came up was useful. It bloody hurts!!! My thoughts come and go and they're always associated with anxiety so it helps me to realise they're just a symptom,same as if I'd cut myself and bled and that I'm not bad or selfish. Good luck and stay strong x
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Old 18-05-12, 13:13
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Beckybooboo Beckybooboo is offline
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Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 197
Re: Scared these intrusive thoughts will never go away.

What is pure “O” ?

Purely Obsessional Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (also called Pure Obsessional OCD, Pure-O, OCD without overt compulsions or Primarily Obsessional OCD)[1] is a lesser-known form or manifestation of OCD. For people with Purely Obsessional OCD, there are usually no observable compulsions, such as those commonly seen in those with the typical form of OCD (checking, counting, hand-washing, etc.). While ritualizing and neutralizing behaviors do take place, they are almost entirely in the form of excessive mental rumination

As per above, pure O is basically a thought which consists of pure obsession. So for example, person A may have a pure obsessional thought about their fidelity in their relationship, person B may have a pure obsessional thought about their appearance, and person C may have a pure obsessional thought about harm.

Pure O thoughts are generically focused on worrying, fear, doubt, anxiety without or with little compulsions. The pure O thought can stem from anything at all and ANYONE whether they have been diagnosed with a mental health issue or not can suffer from them and they can cause extreme discomfort, confusion and upset.

Personally, I’ve been suffering from pure O thoughts for quite a while now and as much as you try to rid yourself of them, they don’t seem to disappear, hence the term obsessional thoughts. Once one of these thoughts come into your head, you begin to doubt and question everything. The anxiety sets in with the obsessional thought which then triggers the “fight or flight” response. This basically means that the brain is stimulated by a fear that has been caused by the though, which then triggers your heart to race and your mind to get crammed and crammed until your head feels like it should EXPLODE!

The key thing to remember with these thoughts is that, they’re actually okay to be there? As odd as this seems, everyone, every second of everyday have these negative thoughts, but because of the anxiety we experience it makes us feel as if the thoughts are crawling through our bodies and manipulating your mind into thinking that your worst nightmare are going to come to life, and at the present time when dealing with an obsessional thought the effects can be devastating as you truly believe that’s who you are, even if you strongly disagree with these thoughts.

The best way to channel these thoughts is remember what came first, did the thought come first and then the doubt? Or the doubt and then the thought… If the thought came first, followed by the doubt then you KNOW it’s an irrational way of thinking. It’s a vicious cycle that everyone gets themselves into and it can make people very upset and angry at what’s going on.

Remember the following process in order to focus on the current reality:

Never give up; there is always a light at the end of the tunnel.
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Old 18-05-12, 17:23
dreamingwolf dreamingwolf is offline
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 16
Re: Scared these intrusive thoughts will never go away.

hi guys I am having some trouble with my thoughts again. I am very very scared right now. I feel like these thoughts have to happen and if they don't then i will have to kill myself. I dont want the thoughts to happen and i dont want to kill myself. it is very agonizing mentally physically and emotionally. It's almost like theres some doomsday that i feel coming where i will have to act on the thoughs to feel happy.

This isnt normal i know that

Trying to set up appt with a psychologist but drs office is closed this weekend.

I am very scared that I feel this way it is making me very very depressed.
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intrusive, scared, thoughts

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