Relapse! Coping, Symptoms and Tips.

[Carnation]

Yes I did fishman
I wasn't really interested in all different ones and what they could do, I couldn't even take in everything they were telling me either. I just wanted a phone!

[Carnation]

My old phone is working perfectly now.
'Patience is a Virtue'

---------- Post added at 10:14 ---------- Previous post was at 09:54 ----------

Oh Sunny Days
Bring on the sunny days, what a difference it makes to your well-being. Not only that, you didn't feel such an idiot for wearing those sunglasses you wear all the time.

I had a average day yesterday. I wasn't falling for the jumped up prices of a media stunt and apart from that I would have been moaning about it and spoiling the magical moment.
Mr C sent me one of those eCards and I secretly setup lunch in the garden under a tree, which nearly killed me carrying everything on a tray. I almost didn't make it and that would have been a sight.
Afterwards I suggested we go to the local church to maybe light a candle for his mum and my mum, but when we got there, it was all locked up.
We ended the day with fish and chips to eat in the comfort of our own home.

My light-headedness was much improved yesterday and I am putting it down to a very good night's sleep.
It's the first night I have slept all the way through for absolutely ages.
I've had some major streses lately and managed to eliminate one of them. We were in the process of moving house and we both realised that we were just not ready to do that just yet. Mr C is still raw over his mum, I've got my continual light-headedness and we were not a hundred percent for where we were going, so we pulled out.
The result was good night's sleep.

[Darksky]

Isn't it a shame that churches are locked nowadays. When I was young they were always open and if you wanted some peace you were always welcome. I suppose it's vandalism, theft etc that forces them to close their doors but it's so wrong and a backward step for society.
We are planning on moving this year. it will be a big job with a house and business so I imagine there will be plenty of sleepless nights for me too. Already I am getting stressed trying to get the place looking saleable.
On a good note my cat is back home. We went to collect him today. Beautiful tube covered in bluebells. Will await the arrival of spring to scatter him. A few tears shed today.

Glad you're sleeping better. Everything is more copable without tiredness dragging us down as well.

[Carnation]

Another sad moment for you Darksky
I put my cat's ashes in a pot and planted something in it. x

---------- Post added at 20:15 ---------- Previous post was at 18:33 ----------

Today I felt like banging my head against a brick wall to shake those anxiety symptoms out, but the thought of having a severe headache or making it worse made me think again
I had a visitor today and could I stay calm? Of course I couldn't. Fidget, fidget, fidget. Face felt like a furnace, eyes not focusing and forever waiting for those dreaded words, "Are you ok?"
One minute I felt like getting up and running around the garden waving my arms in the air and the next minute I felt frozen to my seat.
What a horrible feeling it is, but as my therapist told me, "It's just an uncomfortable feeling, it will pass".
Just wish it would pass sooner and not come so often!

[Darksky]

That's interesting. I'm the same with visitors and I can't work out why.
Is it because we feel pressured into 'behaving' or acting normal? Do we feel trapped? Are we trapped into talking and socialising, we can't run and hide without it looking odd? Are they in control because we have to wait for them to go, rather than if we were in their house we could get up and go at will? I don't know at all and I imagine it's quite common, most of these symptoms are.

[purplepie]

Thank you for the shout out Carnation. The posts from you lot on this thread make me feel not so alone. Just been reading the latest ones about visitors and at the moment that is how I feel, even me popping to next door neighbour brings on anxiety and she is the most lovely lady who wouldn't judge a fly....It is me putting pressure on myself to 'look' and 'act' normal (whatever that is) and feel relaxed and not so self conscious - all hard work!

[MyNameIsTerry]

That's interesting. I'm the same with visitors and I can't work out why.
Is it because we feel pressured into 'behaving' or acting normal? Do we feel trapped? Are we trapped into talking and socialising, we can't run and hide without it looking odd? Are they in control because we have to wait for them to go, rather than if we were in their house we could get up and go at will? I don't know at all and I imagine it's quite common, most of these symptoms are.

I've had it too. It was bad when I was at the worst and extended to loved ones who didn't live with me. It was about disturbing the safe zone, even though nowhere felt safe. It broke routine. That meant loss of control over everything that had to be continually controlled.

There are other reasons too in mine where it depends on the visitor and why they were coming which is only natural when it's going to be a more stressful appointment. With anxiety it just went from that natural stress into stress on steroids.

[Darksky]

Yes Terry, it does extend to loved one who don't live with us. I'll give you an example....

My son, lived with us since year dot. Grows up and moves out. Normal family life. But...after he moved out, he became a "visitor" and if I was alone in the house when his car turned up I felt immediately nervous. My own damn son!! However if my OH was at home with me, I didn't feel nervous at all. I suppose with someone else being there the pressure was off me, to appear normal and entertain him.

[Carnation]

We'll put it down to routine then.
I'm sure anxiety sufferers don't receive many visitors and probably their choice not to do so for those reasons we have just mentioned.
But what if we had regular visitors come on a routine basis, would it be any easier.
Isn't it like going out?
I know if I stop in for 2 or 3 days I find it more difficult to adjust and brave it in the big wide world.
But if I make a point of going out every day, it doesn't seem as difficult.
Unless it is one of my unsafe places I have created for myself like the doctors,dentist, hospital, carehomes; basically anything medical. Having a hot flush just writing about it.
Also wide open spaces,crowds and confined spaces; doesn't leave much left.
I also know for me that the unknown scares me.
Like the phone ringing, someone knocking on my door, a new place, driving into an ​unknown area, plans that change.
There's so much that can potentially set me off, but if prepare for the things that I can or have plan B or C already in place and as far as visitors are concerned, this never fails,"I'm just popping to the loo". If you do that enough times, eventually your visitor will see it as a cue to leave.

---------- Post added at 21:39 ---------- Previous post was at 17:52 ----------

How long have I had my new phone?
Not even a week and the speakers have blown out already.
Now I have to go back to the phone shop and go through another taxing experience.

[MyNameIsTerry]

Yes Terry, it does extend to loved one who don't live with us. I'll give you an example....

My son, lived with us since year dot. Grows up and moves out. Normal family life. But...after he moved out, he became a "visitor" and if I was alone in the house when his car turned up I felt immediately nervous. My own damn son!! However if my OH was at home with me, I didn't feel nervous at all. I suppose with someone else being there the pressure was off me, to appear normal and entertain him.

Yes, that's a good way to consider it. I guess our inner chimp is going bananas over space invasion.

Going out with my GF was hard. The same with family meals. I've explained to them how to me it's like a trip to the dentist for them, it's not a reflection of the event or what I think about them or it but just how my body is responding.

---------- Post added at 05:36 ---------- Previous post was at 05:28 ----------

Carnation, yes I think you are right. It's more what I see as being a fundamental element of GAD in the same way the obsessive-compulsive cycle can be seen to run through HA.

Confidences goes. We don't feel as much trust in ourselves. We worry we won't cope and how embarrassing that will be as well as how unpleasant it feels. We may worry we throw up, something I found in crowded places or anywhere where I felt I couldn't escape.

Maybe we feel trapped? We can leave other places and try to seek safety.

Yes, I think it does get better the more you do things just like going out. Then if you let it slide, just like the therapy tools we learn, it can get harder again but I have found it's not as hard as when you relapse and really have to build up with more pressure on you.

Pressure, no escape, committed whether we want it or not, maybe it differs per situation and between us but I think we all know how it feels and how frustrating it is to be like that. It definitely taints my life.