Health Anxiety is relentless

[NoraB]

I often feel like one of the worst HA sufferers when I look back on the years of fears and reassurance seeking. Having been on medication since 1998 and having had numerous talking therapies makes me feel a bit of a failure too.

If HA was an Olympic sport I always say I'd have been up there with a gold medal around my neck. I was really, really good at HA. Irrationality? Gold medal. Googling skills? Gold medal. Contorting myself into impossible positions to get a better look at my bits? Gold medal. I pushed my brain the the point of having a full-on panic attack at the sight of Mary Berry! (re-read this last one a few times)

There have been few things I have excelled at in life but I can say that I've given health anxiety my A game.

[pulisa]

Mary Berryitis!!! That's a new one for HA stalwarts!

[flatterycat]

It's hard to imagine that you were ever that bad Nora. How did you recover?

[flatterycat]

I've never had therapy for HA but have made my own "rules" which I stick to because I'm boringly disciplined when it comes to how I live! The therapy and meds package isn't necessarily a game changer in terms of alleviation of HA so don't feel that you are a "failure"?

You have done amazingly well to get to where you are without any therapy or medication.

[flatterycat]

Omg Sarah I could have written this post I have suffered with anxiety since I was a kid and have had many rounds of various therapy I’m now 58 and it’s getting worse not better also like you I feel like the boy who cried wolf and think whatever “illness” I currently think I have will be the one that is real and will finish me off spent 30 minutes today checking and re checking my blood pressure and now convinced I’m on the verge of a heart attack or a stroke it’s exhausting and relentless and sometimes I hate being me wishing you peace of mind soon

Hi Smogie
Sorry to hear you are struggling too. You've described my thought processes exactly.

[flatterycat]

Still struggling here.
I'm very tearful and just about holding it all together. I sent an econsult to my doctors and received a text message to say that I already have a telephone appointment booked in for next Thursday, so the doctor will speak to me then. I think this appointment was already in the system as my doc rings me every few weeks to check in on me. All I can think is that my results are abnormal and that as my doctor is already speaking to me next week, they know it will be dealt with then. I feel sick with anxiety and can't think straight.

[NoraB]

Mary Berryitis!!! That's a new one for HA stalwarts!

I'm special.

[NoraB]

It's hard to imagine that you were ever that bad Nora.

I had a mental breakdown FC. It was as bad as it gets (and still be alive)

Correction: It's next to last in terms as as bad as it gets - there is another level and that's to be admitted to a mental hospital. (and my husband apparently gave this some serious thought)

How did you recover?

Firstly, I prefer the term, 'control my health anxiety' because I have OCD, other MH disorders, a brain that's at odds with the world, and I came out me Ma's foo worrying. It's work in progress and always will be but I do believe that people who are less complex can absolutely kick this condition to the gutter..

In answer to your question..

I worked my @rse off. I tried everything and anything. If somebody had told me to go roll around a field of cow pats during a full moon (and it would help) I would have done it. There were lots of things that didn't work but I just kept going..

The most important thing I did was to accept death, dying, and that fact that one day I won't be here (and the world will not fall part)

[flatterycat]

I had a mental breakdown FC. It was as bad as it gets (and still be alive)



Firstly, I prefer the term, 'control my health anxiety' because I have OCD, other MH disorders, a brain that's at odds with the world, and I came out me Ma's foo worrying. It's work in progress and always will be but I do believe that people who are less complex can absolutely kick this condition to the gutter..

In answer to your question..

I worked my @rse off. I tried everything and anything. If somebody had told me to go roll around a field of cow pats during a full moon (and it would help) I would have done it. There were lots of things that didn't work but I just kept going..

The most important thing I did was to accept death, dying, and that fact that one day I won't be here (and the world will not fall part)

I believe I also came out of my mum with anxiety - I can remember the first time I actually worried about my health (when I was around 5 or 6).
Love the cow pat analogy - I can completely agree with that - if it helped, I'd do it.

My OCD is awful right now, especially while waiting for these blood test results. Did/do you take any medication for the anxiety?

[NoraB]

I believe I also came out of my mum with anxiety - I can remember the first time I actually worried about my health (when I was around 5 or 6).

Me too. I recall being five years old and experiencing what I now know to be health anxiety. I understand that I was experiencing constant fight or flight (coinciding with school) and that these strange symptoms made me think I was unwell and this was the pattern until I learned about the stress response..

Love the cow pat analogy - I can completely agree with that - if it helped, I'd do it.

Did/do you take any medication for the anxiety?

Unfortunately for me, when I had my latest (and most severe) flare up of HA, I'd also developed fibromyalgia (with multiple chemical sensitivity) so the anxiety meds I'd previously taken without having side-effect issues were now incredibly problematic, and at the lowest dose. My doc tried me on several medications but I had to be taken off all of them within a few days. I controlled my HA with therapy alone (and of course going through my lifestyle with a very fine toothcomb to see where potential triggers/stimulants were) because I had no choice. I think there is a really good argument for the combination of meds & therapy but relying on meds alone for HA will only ever take the edge off the symptoms. Meds can get us into a more receptive state in order to engage with (and benefit from) therapy but they will not deal with the root cause..