Brain tumour fears - please help!

[jojo2316]

So here I am again, with yet another fear. This time it's brain cancer and I am so frightened. Please help if you can. I have been having headaches since August and I am not usually a headachey person. Also I worry that I might have slightly blurry vision sometimes (I am constantly testing this - and it seems to vary). I e been to the GP who knows all about my anxiety and says i do not have a brain tumour.... but how can she know? I am thinking of booking an MRI scan privately but I'm terrified too. I think this time my worst fears are actually coming true.
When I try to be sensible I try to tell myself the following:
My headaches are very mild, probably if I wasn't thinking about them I wouldn't notice them.
I started getting headaches AFTER I started worrying about a brain tumour.

BUT I am properly sooooo worried.

Please lend support if you can
Jojo xx

[Blonde123]

Hi Jojo

Ive had the same worries so I know how you feel. Why not get your eyes checked out? Maybe your overdue? Think your mind is playing on your fears. Try and rationalise how you feel with what your thinking x

[nomorepanic]

Agreed - have you got your eyes checked?

[jojo2316]

Thank you so much for replying- I did get my eyes check actually and they were fine, and no sign of increased intracranial pressure etc.
I do think I am making my own symptoms worse by monitoring them constantly but I don't know how to stop!
I'd say I feel headachey a lot of the time as opposed to actually having a headache.... I know that probably doesn't make sense, but if I close my eyes and relax all my muscles and try to pinpoint WHERE it's hurting it's not really there.... but then I get these twinges and they change location, and I keep wondering if my vision is strange.... but I can't pinpoint that either because I can see fine ..
I know I sound mad.... but I'm also very worried because people with health anxiety disorders can get ill too right?!?
Thank you so much again for replying- it helps more than you know!
E
Jojo xxx

[Shimmy81]

Hi jojo,

Ok you have had your eyes tested and all is fine. The optician can usually see signs of a brain tumour behind the eye and if they didn’t then that a very very good sign. I have had the same fears as you in the past....and still suffer from blurry vision despite having eyes checked and all being fine.

A brain tumour would give you other symptoms too, such as dizziness, nausea and vomiting, feeling off balance and very bad head aches. Which you do not have. Your “headache”sounds like it is from anxiety and tension causing your muscles to contract around your head, with all the worrying you are doing. Once you stop this worrying your symptoms will subside.

Do not google your symptoms.

Relax you are fine. Hope this helps

[jojo2316]

Thank you so much for replying 😊
Actually I do sometimes feel a little dizzy and nauseous but again that could be anxiety. I only ever seem to get one symptom at a time. When I am worrying about blurred vision the headache is totally gone and I am worrying about dizziness that is the only thing I have. In fact it was an episode of sort of dizziness followed by feelings of panic, back in July that started this whole thing. I was so worried about it and I thought maybe a brain tumour had caused it. Then I started worrying so much, I thought "I bet I get headaches next".....
And lo and behold!!!! And since the headaches started the dizziness has totally gone! I haven't had dizziness since August (though it happened quite frequently before that, when I was focusing on it!)

It's funny, because when I read other people's posts it is so obvious to me that they are not suffering from the thing they fear. And I so wish I could make them see it, so they won't feel scared any more, and yet they can't see it.... just as I can't see it!!!
Thank you for listening
Jojo x

[jojo2316]

I realise what I am doing must surely be making things worse, but I am CONSTANTLY monitoring my head for pressure sOUensations/pain to "test" for the likelihood of a tumour. As soon as I wake in the morninglL I think "does my head hurt" (no), then I am hyper aware of any sensations as I go about my day.
I do not have a headache yet but already I can feel a slight tightening on the right hand side, like a pressure. And I am so worried about the day ahead and whether a proper headache will develop and it will be a true sign of a brain tumour.
I'm aware how all this sounds, but this is the way my mind is working!!
Aaarrrrghhh!
Please talk me down if you can
Jojo xx

[Velociraptor]

Even if you do get a headache, it doesn't mean it's down to a tumour. There are so many reasons why you could get a headache, things you wouldn't even think of. Headaches is even a symptom of IBS apparenty!

If you keep worrying the way you are I think you are going to give yourself a headache through stress.

I've had the brain tumour worry myself in the past and now I know that it sounds absolutely ridiculous.

If you truly did have a brain tumour, you wouldn't be thinking "is something wrong?" you'd be thinking "something is definitely wrong!" as you'd be having the worst headaches of your life!

The fact that you don't have any headaches at all is a great sign which you can really take as a positive.

You're thinking about your head too much. You need to take your mind off of it, and focus on other things. Distraction is going to be key for you.

The human brain is such a powerful tool, put it to better use than worrying about your head.

Keep yourself busy, live your life.

You got this

[jojo2316]

Thank you so much for replying and talking sense! What were your brain tumour worries and why do you now know they were rediculous? Do mine sound rediculous?
In a way, it is a comfort if they do! And yet..... maybe I am just downplaying my very real symptoms (although, come to think of it, I do have a severe health anxiety disorder, so downplaying symptoms is not something I am known for!!)
Anyway, I am still so worried that tight feelings in head will turn into a headache and that I will panic, that I have taken paracetamol to preempt it. But then if I DO get a headache anyway it will be "unresponsive to medication": a sign of a tumour! Arrrrgh! Please make this stop!!
Thank you again for replying
Jojo x

[jojo2316]

This morning i woke with what I would describe as a "ghost" of a headache . I couldn't really decide if it was there or not but it set me off worrying about brain tumours again.. I had this worry all summer and got daily headaches- by Jen my worry moved to bowel cancer an then ALS and the headaches disappeared.
Yesterday I was in such a state about ALS and now this. It probably seems from the outside beyond irrational and yet here I am: monitoring my head for sensations - seeing if coughing, or straining, induces a headache etc.
I'm sorry.
Xxxx