Tonight my husband was cleaning out our file cabinet and getting rid of some old papers. He found some heart monitor test results I had done back in 2012. It was a whole packet of papers that, at the end, said my heart is healthy. It was an expensive test, basically fueled by HA. There were all kinds of complaints from me in those records, like shortness of breath, swelling in neck. I rated my pain as a 5. I am obviously still here and ok, 6 years later. My HA comes and goes, now I get blips here and there, but I’ve just come off the worst HA year I’ve ever had. It’s not new for me, and I’ve had a bunch of tests run again over the past year or so. I’m under the treatment of a psychiatrist and doing much better overall. Seeing those records made me see what HA has been doing to me. I’ve been at this more than 6 years. I’m ready to move on from this, I haven’t always been this way, and I want to get back to how I was before. Sometimes I think my HA came from having kids, but I remember having it before that. I need to stay off this site, as I feel it triggers me, but I’m like a moth to a flame. I’ve ceased almost all googling, and am actually feeling pretty good. This post is basically just me rambling about my HA, but it makes me mad that I’ve let it have control over so many months and years of my life.