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Thread: Tapering down..

  1. #11

    Re: Tapering down..

    Keep going guys, we will get there eventually.
    I'm on day 6 of 37.5mg, and things are getting easier.
    Day 4 was the the worst for me, up to that point things got harder and then peaked, not really many physical symptons ( a touch of nausea, head aches), it was more a black mood, slight confusion and heightened anxiety.
    I have slept really well though the last few nights, and today has been ok. Quite positive and chirpy, and very sociable, which isnt like me at all!
    I'm going to stay on this dose for at least another week as i have 2 very important job interviews next week that i need to be on the ball for.
    Hang in there, and please chime in with how you are doing, we can do this together!

  2. #12
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Location
    , , United Kingdom.
    Posts
    815

    Re: Tapering down..

    Hi Jomo

    Hmm sounds like you had a difficult childhood and I think you have done marvellously to get where you are today. You would have had to study hard and ho to university in order to qualify as a lawyer. Yes, it's an incredibly stressful job, I was a legal secretary for many years to a senior partner and he suffered with stress related problems. Huge well done to you.

    You sound very motivated and in control and I'm a wee bit jealous lol. Yes, we all have a game face we use for the outside world and obviously this is what you use for work. Feeling bad inside and acting as if we are fine is very tiring though. I'm sure you're a wonderful father to your child and a good husband.

    Yes, hearing your partner gently snoring whilst you yourself are wide awake with thoughts running amock around your mind is not nice. I think there are so many people who suffer in silence.. those who will not seek help and just grin and bear it and get on as best they can.

    Keep up the positivity and take care... hope the 30mg is working better for you.

    ---------- Post added at 16:32 ---------- Previous post was at 13:23 ----------

    Hi JoMo

    Yes Claire Weekes in excellent but acceptance is something I have never been able to achieve. Sounds like you had a traumatic childhood and you should be incredibly proud of yourself for being where you are today. So you're a lawyer - yes a very stressful job. Huge praise to you because you would have had to study hard and go to uni - quite an achievement for someone who suffered a diffficult childhood. I know how stressful law is .. I was a legal PA to a senior partner of a large law firm in London and my own boss suffered illness due to stress. You should be so proud of yourself to be working suffering this horrid illness.

    Sounds like you have a very positive attitude, seeing each day as a new project and believing that tomorrow can be different etc. I only wish I could be like this.. I do try hard. I am sure you are a wonderful father and husband.

    I reduced the med down by another 15mg on Thursday night so now only on 15mg which I will stay on for the next 21 days. Feeling very low, very anxious. I can increase it back up to 30mg if I can't cope - my psychiatrist has told me to do this if I can't cope and his instructions to my gp were to decrease by 15mg every two weeks and not weekly as they have stupidly put in place. I am going to try to stick with this and see how I go over the weekend. I just want off this medicine. In fact I would like to come off all meds but definitely don't think that's possible.

    Sending love and light from across the pond... Keep up the positivity it's brilliant

    ---------- Post added at 16:33 ---------- Previous post was at 16:32 ----------

    Sorry... two replies above! I looked earlier and it seemed my first post hadn't appeared so replied again..... oh well... never mind. I think I have to get used to posting in this group again
    __________________
    Yvonne
    Colchester Essex

  3. #13
    Join Date
    Jul 2017
    Posts
    283

    Re: Tapering down..

    Hi Yvonne,

    Not across the pond - I am in London!

    Thanks for your kind words - I think I am actually pretty lucky in comparison to many people on here, in that I am able to function (though it is often a struggle) relatively ok even when on minor amounts of meds.

    I have gone back down to 15mg as 30mg was too much for me. I am now trying taking it in the morning to see if that helps with the insomnia, but today I have felt very groggy all day, so that may not be the answer.

    Please go as slowly as you can manage - I totally understand the frustration with the meds and the desire to come off them, but withdrawal can suddenly kick in after a week or so of feeling fine, and that can be horrible. The slower the better.

    At the end of the day, our brains just dont make enough of the right chemicals to keep us well. There is nothing wrong with taking a drug to help them in that situation, the hard thing is just finding the right one for you. Personally if I can find a way for Mirt to work for me, I plan on being on it for the rest of my life if necessary (or at least until they invent some magic cure!)

    Just try to remember that your body has probably shown you all the horrible feelings it is capable of giving you now, and you survived them, so you can survive this...

  4. #14
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Location
    , , United Kingdom.
    Posts
    815

    Re: Tapering down..

    Morning.... Jo Mo

    Ahh only just seen this post .. so please ignore what I've said on your thread of your Mirt Diary. I was wondering why on earth you would be taking the med in the morning. Just read that you're trying to overcome the insomnia and so trying taking it a.m. So sorry that you didn't feel so good yesterday. Ooh so you are in the same place as me, - you have gone down from 30mg to 15. It isn't easy I have to admit.

    Aww .. and thank you for your kind words also. Maybe I should be taking this withdrawal more slowly, I just don't know. I will use your word and say that I am feeling very groggy, lethargic, weak, low low mood. Sleep - seem to go off okay but waking several times in the night and been awake since about 4 a.m. this morning. I will see how I am tomorrow, (will take it easy again today) - if I feel awful I may have to take the med back up a bit. No way do I want to go into withdrawal as I had a severe withdrawal many years ago from another anti depressant which I feel I have never really got over.

    Whoops... Didn't realise you were in UK - thought you were in US. Yes I guess we do need these meds to sort our seratonim levels.. I often worry that having been on these sort of meds for so many years that my brain won't be able to produce any seratonim naturally ever again.

    Anyway, really hope you're feeling better today .. keep us posted.
    __________________
    Yvonne
    Colchester Essex

  5. #15
    Join Date
    Jul 2017
    Posts
    283

    Re: Tapering down..

    No worries about the other thread....

    I am going to try and stick on 15mg long term if I can, but I just need to find some way to beat this insomnia. It has been almost 2 months now of getting on average 4hrs sleep a night and I am nearing the end of my tether. Felt suicidal at 4am last night as I just felt like I could not take it any more. But I know that is not real, and I know I would never do anything silly, but I do worry about the effect of all this lack of sleep on my health in general.

  6. #16
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Location
    , , United Kingdom.
    Posts
    815

    Re: Tapering down..

    Jomo.....

    So so sorry to hear you were having suicidal thoughts in the early hours... they are dreadful and I get them all the time. Like you, feel I would never act on it but I just hate having the thought in the first place. Oh dear, 4 hours sleep a night ... dreadful and to have suffered this for so long will make you feel ill. God knows how you manage to go to work. Yes staying on the 15mg sounds like a good idea. The sleep problems coming off this med are horrible.. I really hope you start to feel better soon. Is the sleeper not working for you? I know with the sleeping tablets people become immune to them very quickly....
    __________________
    Yvonne
    Colchester Essex

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