I was a young mum at 18y i now have 4 kids now and I'm 28y. I have the same fear but my fear dosn't effect me much anymore these day's unless I'm realy forced to face it for some reason usaly by my sister she just love to talk about that but my 6 year has also talk about it since she was about 3 after we lost our nana.

Are you taking any meds, what eva it is that scare's you about so much need'd be chalenge by telling your self truthfull fact based information instead of going in to a what if converstation. This may be hard but if it a daily fear that you just get positive past fact's will help ease you fear over time.

In stead of telling your self that you would hate to not see them grow up focus on having fun with your kids. When you feel the fear starting try to just get up a get involved and have fun with them. I like to just turn the music up real loud and dance really silly with my kids just to have fun with them and take a time out from dealing with adult issue's. Look in to children's eye's and see the peace and happiness thay and inercent's of not really having to deal with the thing's that you are scared of and just remember what is what like to be a kid and get on there level have have fun the way thay have fun for while.

I think there is lot of thing's that we as parent tend to forget about and we have so much to worry about that our kids can teach us just haw to forget for while. It works for me I put all my effort in to just having fun with my kids and not worring about the world around me so much. 3 Year's later I've made huge prgress with little effort and now I'm ready to try life on my own a little bit more i can do things with my kids with ease but on my own I still a lot of work a head of me.

I hope I help.