hi helen

i am very lucky in that my mum and husband totally sympathise with what i have been through but that they still say they cannot imagine what it must be like - it is very difficult to put yourself in other people's shoes so i am sure your family just have no idea of what a nightmare anxiety can be. Some people also find the idea of anything "mental/emotional" a bit of a stigma and just don;t know how to deal with it.

You are bound to take everything personally because of how sensitized the anxiety makes you feel. i think you should explain everything to them as best you can and then like emmas says - try to focus on your own recovery. i only really started coming on in leaps and bounds when i decided to take charge of my recovery - i still talked to my mum if i felt terrible but i decided not to let anxiety beat me or stop me living my life - that i was going to allow it to be there but not hold me back. I am now back to living a full life - i have my wobbles but i just let the symptoms come back if they want - accept them and they soon pass. i hope you can reach this stage too.

At the end of the day anxiety/depression is a selfish illness in that we forget that those around us have their own problems/may be looking for support. This is not to make people feel guilty but the very nature of our condition makes us look inwards and focus on ourselves. why not tell your parents about your panic etc and then really try and see the journey back from the hospital as a challenge - think "so what i panic and dad has to stop the car - what is the worst thing that can happen to me?". this is exactly the method i used for my recovery and if i felt anxious i simply let it wash over me until it passed - anxiety can only build if you let it. xx