Quote Originally Posted by MyNameIsTerry View Post
There are lots of financial pluses, that's true. But it's a social stigma issue. It's like someone you haven't seen for a while asking what you do for a living and reply unemployed. You just feel like a big failure.

I lie about employment. It saves "the look", despite not being on benefits, but it's not just that it saves me the bad feeling but the potential argument telling them to STFU.
This is so true, but I do think it is becoming more acceptable to stay at home now with rising housing costs and for many people minimum wage jobs. I'm sure it was much tougher years ago when far fewer people did it. That's where a lot off the stigma started as to stay at home you were 'not fully grown up, being defined as a mummy's boy, daddy's girl, or had a 'problem' or whatever. I'm also pleased I'm not the only one who had to lie about being unemployed! For men it's often the first question anyone asks of you and seems to define you completely. I guess this is more common for women too now as well. So the ladies get that on top of the pressure to settle down with kids and all that! I even felt the need to invent a social life and imaginary friends as I was so p-d off with people feeling sorry for me!!!

NervousA1, I can see how hard it is when family members get old and pass away. I had lots of relatives around when I was young, but they're nearly all gone now. At least you have a brother. He hopefully will be around for most if not all of your lifetime which is more than some people have. I spent years feeling ashamed for not having a proper life, but did manage to turn that around in my 30s when I met a girl who was very similar to me personality wise, but more independent and confident in the areas where I was severely lacking. Together we made a great team and both moved on. I don't think you need a lot of friends in life, but it does help to have one or two good ones to help you through. It doesn't matter who they are whether they are in the family or people you have met along the way. And yes, good friends are hard to find!!!!!!