I just feel like I need a big arm round my shoulder and someone that I trust and respect to say 'there, there everythings ok. I'll deal with it.' I guess we all would like that really. The important thing is to realise that we could have that if we wanted it, but we would be very fragile and dependent people.

Have you heard the story of the boy who found the chick trying to break out of the egg? He thought he was doing the right thing by taking the shell away and helping it to break through, but the chick died very shortly afterwards because it needed the struggle of breaking through the shell to toughen it up for the world that awaited it.

This illness really is horrendous, but I know that it's doing me good by making me confront things that I've been afraid of and things that I have ran away from. It's making me more outgoing, less passive. it's forcing me to do things that will make my life better, it's forcing me to toughen up and to learn how to be happy. It's making me learn new skills and it's changing my attitude for a much more positive one. It's making me go out and find people, to find help and not be so self-reliant. It's forcing me to be sociable. It's making me open my mind. It's actually going to make me a much calmer person.

Ships in harbour are safe..but that's not what ships were built for.