Overnight visitors

[Elle-Kay]

We've got visitors arriving shortly who will leave again tomorrow, and I've woken up feeling really miserable about it It's not that I don't want to see them, or that they're not nice people, it's just that this is my space, and I don't like it being 'invaded', or having to pretend that I'm happy and the ideal hostess when inside I'm in turmoil. We'll have to go out to dinner tonight, which is another challenge in itself (I've only just got used to going out for dinner with my family again).

The last time these visitors were here I spent the whole two days (apart from a couple of hours) in my room, in bed with a migraine/anxiety attack. I felt so bad at the time, but now I feel even worse because:
1. I'm afraid the same will happen again, and I can't cope with that level of anxiety again
2. I feel that I can't even excuse myself to my room when I feel overwhelmed, in case they think "there she goes again!" and start to think that I don't want them to visit (they come a long way to visit us, because I can't go to them).

How am I going to get through the next 24hours...?

[Arnie365]

Do they know about your anxiety and are they good friends? If so just be upfront with them if you feel you can.

For me the hardest part is telling people about my anxiety (which is why I've told very few people) but with the people who know I'm very honest about how I'm feeling and not to take it personally if I seem withdrawn etc.

Good luck. From reading your other posts your really strong and I'm sure you can cope with it just fine if you believe you can.

[Magic]

Elle- Kay,
Have you got calmers meds to see you through?
Best if you can manage to go out for the meal.
The visitors surely know of your situation anyway, so if you have a bad turn,
you cannot help it--- and they ought to have kept that in mind.
Keep going Elle . All the best x

[Annie0904]

Thinking of you Elle-Kay, I know how hard this can be after my Christmas visitors. I hope it goes well for you and that you are able to enjoy their company. Sometimes the anticipation before they arrive can be worse than them being there. I just kept disappearing to my room for 10 minutes to give me little breaks.

[Elle-Kay]

Hi guys, thanks for your replies. They arrived about 4 hours ago, while I was out doing the grocery shopping, and I've currently got them settled in front of the TV watching "Mr Selfridge" on catch-up, so at least I don't feel so much that the attention is on me for an hour! Hopefully we'll be able to find something else to watch afterwards, lol.

I bought myself a history magazine at the supermarket, so I suppose I can dip into reading that to distract myself if necessary.

---------- Post added at 15:00 ---------- Previous post was at 14:57 ----------

p.s. they're also busy eating their way through a big tub of Celebrations, so maybe they'll have full tummies & fall asleep soon?!

[Col]

Ahhhh Elle -Kay , I bet you already feel exhausted after all the apprehension as well.

Sounds like your off to a good start. Before you know it they will be packing their bags.

Hope you enjoy your time with them, though it is nice & I'm sure they will understand if you really have to have 5 minutes rest on your own. Good friends should understand and they sound like they are good friend, so try not to worry.

Collette

[Elle-Kay]

Update: we're back from our meal out, which went ok (I managed to eat my gammon, two eggs & a handful of the big pile of chips + sat through the others having pudding without too much trouble - anxiety only about 4 to 5 out of 10 at the most). I'm feeling a bit more generally anxious now (about 7 out of 10), but that's because I'm tired and have a full stomach I think so I'll try to ride it out.

We've put the new Ken Follett adaptation on channel 4, which is on until nearly 11pm so I suppose they won't be ready to go to bed until after that now, but at least if push comes to shove I can excuse myself and go to bed now without it being out of character.

[Annie0904]

Oh you have done so well. gammon, egg and chips is something I can usually manage to choose on a menu (quite limited to what I will eat when out). You must be feeling exhausted by now.

[Elle-Kay]

Thanks Annie - I felt 'safe' with gammon & egg too, but you're right: I am feeling pretty worn out now, and in all honesty would much prefer to be tucked up in my bed watching this Ken Follett thing with a hot water bottle at my feet!

[Annie0904]

I am watching Mrs Brown's Boys, always makes me laugh