Can't switch off.

[Mrsh11]

Am going through a tough time at work and it's really starting to take over my life. I constantly worry about being fired for underperforming. I manage a company day to day and all my experienced staff are leaving due to hating my boss, the director. She doesn't see this as an issue and constantly makes me feel like a failure. The problem is I can't stop myself from turning everything into a catastrophe and imagining the worst. At this rate it will become a self fulfilling prophecy as I feel too fried to do much of anything. I can't switch my brain off when at home but at work it seems to stop working, like I freeze up. I really struggle to sleep and a lot of the physical symptoms like sweating and palpitations are back. I am wondering if anyone has been through something similar and if they have any advice please?

[AnxietyDJ]

The only thing I can suggest is to try and break your problems / work down into smaller, manageable tasks that you can focus on one by one, rather than getting stressed about everything as a whole, which will always seem like a mountain that can never be climbed.

Remember that you got your job and position by doing positive things and performing well and therefore you are obviously capable of continuing down the same road.

Good luck and let us know how you're doing

[Neon]

You sound like you still have some distance from the situation and aren't at the point where you start believing your fears, you KNOW something isn't right, and that's a good thing. You're still in connection with your instincts which are trying to help you. Trust in these. You're in a difficult place and there's only a few things you can do. Why? Because all this stress is caused by other peoples actions and youre feeling out of control. We can't control other people. I think that will be so helpful for you to address- find ways where you can feel in control or at least acknowledge your own power. Is there anything practical you can do to improve your sense of job security or maybe realistically improve your comfort levels at work? This might give you a new direction or renewed hope in your own abilities to survive. I think it's so important to remember your job is not You. You have all the capabilities and skills to replace it and succeed just fine. But stress can make us forget we're useful strong important people.

My father is a workaholic and had a nervous breakdown because of it. His grip on reality was very very loose. He sort of lived in this bubble where his job meant literally everything. Even if he worked himself to death, it didn't matter, he still had to provide for us. It was bizarre. We would have been just fine if he lost his job etc but he was literally petrified. His whole purpose in life, in his opinion, was to work. If he lost his job he would be nothing. No one. He didn't believe us when we said he was loved etc. That it was going to be ok. This was to the detriment of our home life. We never saw him. And when we did he was stressed or working from home. It was very ugly. Not as bad as these family annihilation cases but it got pretty dark. Eventually he calmed down a bit. I think exhaustion kicked in and he realised he couldn't do it anymore. It made him very angry and frustrated and that actually helped him make changes. He still lives to work but he's learnt how to say No now and he's offloaded a lot of fear now his children are capable of looking after themselves. But it's a very difficult frame of mind to get out of and I recommend taking serious action now. No job should ever make anyone feel that way. You deserve better xx

[Mrsh11]

Thank you both for the advice. I am trying to work on keeping myself separate from the situation and am now considering looking for another job. Another colleague resigned yesterday but the directors never seem to care. In any other business alarm bells would ring when staff turnover is so high. Realistically I know I could get a new job much quicker than they could find a new manager but it's so hard to stop the anxiety. I am off work today but constantly turn over in my head what will happen tomorrow. I think my best bet is distraction.