Depression and anxiety simultaneously?
I swear I don’t know what’s wrong with me…I was doing pretty well. I had several days of happiness and normality – I had forgotten what that felt like – then had a little blip and all of a sudden I’m struggling again.
I do plan to call in and get a new therapist. I think having someone to talk to might be helpful.
Previously, it was like my anxiety and depression went in cycles. One day I was amped up, couldn’t sit still, totally freaking out about something, and the next day I couldn’t get out of bed.
Then, my meds kicked in and my anxiety wasn’t too bad at all. Depression was still a problem and has been getting somewhat worse, but still it was an improvement in one area at least.
Now, I’m just tired all the time unless I can adequately distract myself. But it’s like my anxiety and depression have converged. I’m still totally agitated and freaking out about multiple things, but it’s like there is an underlying darkness and hopelessness underneath it. For example, while I have many things I worry about, my skin has been BIG lately. I’m terrified of all the spots coming back, trying to come to terms with myself. So I’m freaking out about that, trying to figure out what I would do in a worst-case scenario, all that stuff….but underneath I’m thinking that it won’t do any good anyway, what happens will happen and it WILL be bad no matter how hard I try….and then I just can’t take it anymore and lie down. I’m just exhausted.
I’m planning a trip to the UK with one of my best friends this July and I’ve never been so I’m super excited (she has family there) but all this other stuff is just a massive weight and I feel like I’m not worthy of such a fun trip. I’m not nervous about the trip at all, just not good enough for it.
What to do? Any words of advice/encouragement?
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