Mum

[Darksky]

I hope she does come home tomorrow. To have her own stuff around her and being in her own house will be a boost to her, however gentle it will be there. Hospital discharge is a nightmare. They say you can go and proceed to keep you in another 3 hours. It will happen though.

Anytime you want to post don’t hesitate. We are all here for you and all your family.

[Catkins]

Hope all goes well today Terry.

[Scass]

Thinking of you Terry.

[MyNameIsTerry]

Thanks guys, I always appreciate your kindness and advice.

Sadly it all went wrong today in a 'left hand right hand' way. Mum is back on oxygen, despite the oxygen team previously saying there was no need, and the oxygen was apparently booked for tomorrow. So the deputy ward manager advised it was best to stay otherwise she may struggle overnight.

That sounds reasonable and was our decision yesterday when the consultant asked if we wanted to go but then...

...we get handed a number to call the medical company who tell me they tried to deliver. No phone call before to make sure we are in. If they had we could have come home today. The discharge coordinator new nothing about it.

Tomorrow will be day 8 since we agreed with the consultant to take her home. FFS.

[fishman65]

Terry, this all sounds very familiar to me. The times we had this kind of scenario with Dad. 'He's ready to go home' followed by 'he's been moved to ward X' etc. He was moved to a rehab unit, a frail 94 year old when the users at that unit were all in their 60s or 70s. How much can you rehabilitate a 94 year old?

And that place lost his false teeth, we never did get them back. Like you say, no coordination between different departments. And there you are with your Mum still in hospital 8 days on, its ridiculous.

Hang in there mate, we're all on your side.

[pulisa]

Absolutely appalling mess for you but par for the course re discharge. It really shouldn't be like this but the reality is that you have to suffer as a family as a result of lack of communication and common sense. As for "lost property"...amazing how much stuff gets "mislaid" in a restricted environment.

I'd say yes to everything that is offered for you to have at home for her. To cover all eventualities. You don't want her readmitted.

Hoping for good news tomorrow, Terry. You're doing all you can..It must make you so angry.

[Darksky]

None of this surprises me in the least. As you say, left hand, right hand. My mother has a district nurse twice a week ( if she’s lucky) and there’s no continuity between them. One undoes what the previous one did.

I agree with Pulisa, say yes to everything. We had the most ridiculous amount of kit sent home for her. Half of it she ended up not needing and we sent it back but until we got her into a routine and worked out what was required we were grateful for it.

i do hope this gets resolved soon for you. It must be doing your head in, at an already difficult time.

[MyNameIsTerry]

Yes, we always make sure we leave nothing of value and pack everything ourselves. Last time the ambulance crew lost her teddy bear on the way home.

Well, after a whole load of disorganization we did make it home Friday night. Mum was relaxed with me there and had a really good night. She was smiling, happy, chatty. She drank plenty, even ate a small meal of cheese on toast (not had that since being in) and we watched some films together.

I got the oxygen sorted and because the gas fire is too close dad had to run around to get a convector heater.

Mum has been very sleepy but mostly peaceful since. She is drinking but not eating. She says she will have something later though and we don't want to push her now.

We have used the oxygen a few times because her readings were low and some behaviours showed. Last night she started grabbing for me, just like before the seizure at the hospital, so we quickly got her stabilised. If we didn't have oxygen we would already be back in A&E. It angers me that a 30 minute test by the oxygen team is considered an appropriate test for someone with a history of slow drops over days. Lazy staff.

Prior to getting home no one explained the nebuliser schedule so I chased that up. I got the runaround from one doctor passing it to the nurse and vice versa but got there in the end. I asked whether being on oxygen 2 days meant it was needed more now but the nurse couldn't find a record of who or why it had started, couldn't explain it and said ask the district nurse to monitor. Basically passing the buck.

The ambulance turned up to find no Respect form (has to be with the patient), discharge letter and report for the district nurse ready. By that time the meds were ready but not properly explained. The ambulance crew had to wait and weren't impressed. They checked the paperwork as the lack of organisation made they wary of things being missing.

It shouldn't be like this. Dad on his own would have struggled to keep on top of them all. Imagine old folks with no one?

The district nurse turned up yesterday when my brother was visiting. The hospital said they asked for Monday, the district nurse said she was booked for next day. She was very helpful.

[Carnation]

I know I haven't said much on this thread but I am thinking of you Terry. It's all so familiar hearing your woes and I think you are doing incredibly well under the circumstances.

[pulisa]

I'm glad the district nurse was helpful and prompt to visit. No it shouldn't be like this at a time of high stress for you all but it's sadly a familiar pattern of disjointed admin, poor quality staff and no common sense.

It must be very challenging for you with all the new equipment and developing a routine whilst being permanently alert for any red flags. I hope she sleeps well tonight and remains calm and stable xx