When you have real symptoms??

[sel123]

Thank you!!!!

The panic can be so intense. I read and re-read a book called “Needing to Know for Sure” which addresses how to stop this need for certainty.

I did end up seeing my doctor and the comfort of seeing someone who is compassionate and cares reminded me why I won’t be doing any more urgent care trips.

He did a full exam and doesn’t think that’s it’s anything to worry about - he must’ve said it 4/5 times. He’s sending me for a non-urgent ultrasound which sounds like protocol. At first I was feeling a tremendous amount of relief but then the adrenaline quickly faded and I fell back into worry land again. As is the case with HA! I was hoping I wouldn’t need any more tests but I’m sure if he didn’t order an U/S I would’ve questioned that too. My brain doesn’t stop and waiting for tests is agonizing.

I’m just going to try to keep busy, keep moving and doing whatever I can in the interim.

Thanks for reading

[sel123]

I am so sorry for the double post!! I’m hoping writing this helps clear my head as I have a lot I need to do today and right now feel awful.

I can’t sleep and then wake up with terrible dread. Of course I fell down a rabbit hole last night and read bad stories. All I can think about are my kids and how much they need me.

I wish I had started medication. I can really see now that without it I’m just not going to get out of this. I’ve suffered from HA most of my life but this last decade has been the worst and I’ve wasted so much time.

I honestly thought I would be OK this week after my Dr’s appt and that I would be able to relax until the ultrasound. It’s not happening and now I’m terrified that they will send me for more tests. I honestly can’t believe I’m here again.

Thanks for reading.