I already made a post yesterday and i think ive had hocd since november but there still one question that bugs me the most and im finally getting some help my parents are taking me to a physiatrist . but the one things that really bugs me is can hocd really turn you gay because this past week has been really hard everytime i look at any girl it can be anybody even my mom i always have to say she's pretty but then i get this feeling that feels like attraction and that really confuses me because i have been getting these feelings throughout the past months of suffering with hocd and they didnt bug me as much before because i still had crushes and fantasies about other guys but now those feelings towards women feel like i actally like them and sometimes i just let them go which bothers me because then i think why didint freak out,and now i cant tell the differnce between what my mind is saying and what my heart is saying because wheneve i see a girl and say she's pretty my heart also responds with that feeling you get when see something all of a sudden and your like what. Its hard to explain but im reaally freaking out i cry all the time because nothing feels real and sometimes i look back and just think that all my other obessions were just a cover up for being gay. And at night it's worst because whenever i close my eyes before i would always dream about men and other nice things but now it's seems so real like it's just normal because anytime i close my eyes my head will be filled with thoughts of other women and its like im sleeping but im awake because i can still see what im dreaming and i wont even freak out i just let the thoughts be and then i open my eyes and think that im actally gay because i didnt freak out or stop the thoughts because they just feel so real and normal which freaks me out even more and whenever i try to think about something else like me working at a job at first it will be ok but then my mind says your a lesbian and id just wake up so confused and i try to think about what just dreamt but my mind doesnt let me and that really bugs me but one day i had another dream but with men and i was with some guy and just kissing hima and all that good stuff and it just felt so right but then i woke up and it was gone. Now im just scared that all my thoughts have been replaced and it really hurts i cry all the time just thinking about how much i used to love men . I used to love the beatles they were my favourite band and i always fantazied being with each one of them even though they are so much older tehn me lol, i still rember in the 7th grade i would always pretend i was george harrisons wife and imagine how are life would have been like and i always admird his first wife pattie boyd because she was so flawless and pretty and i considred her my fashion muse and i had pictures of both of them in my room, but now i cant cant even imagine myself with him anymore or anybody else it brings tears to my eyes and whenecver i look at pattie or any other girl i considered a role model i always get those feelings taht feel like attraction but bug me so much because i know i dont like them that way, and because of all this i had to take down all my posters from my wal and while i was doing that i cried so much i kept thinking to myself what's the point of looking at something you cant enjoy anymore, and also can hocd really turn you gay tahts my main question or is this still hocd becasue why am i noticing women more tahn men and are there different phases of hocd . please relply back i really need some help and please check out my other post.