Day 40... Woke up shaky this morning after waking up early then having restless sleep until about 10am. Kind of after effects from Friday I suppose. Got dressed and ready to get my day started. Had plans to have a nice lunch out followed by shopping to find a new area rug for the house and some odds and ends. Ate lunch then started up on the odds and ends when I felt overwhelmed. Not anxious, so to speak, but fatigued, nauseated, low mood and overall cruddy. Asked the wife to head home and just kind of rested the remainder of the day. Felt defeated. It's been a while since I wasn't able to just "gut out" the negative feelings. This blip is hitting harder than I thought it would. Ended up ordering a pizza for dinner because I wasn't at all feeling cooking and my wife was craving junk food. Ended up going to bed about midnight, optimistic that my blip would be lifting soon.

Day 41... Woke up shaky again. Had plans to have lunch with friends, but their baby was spitting up all morning so they had to cancel. The way I was feeling had me sort of relieved. Still, I pushed myself out the door to get errands done and had lunch. The feelings from the previous day has stuck around. Still feeling negative overall. No panic, thankfully, but just an overall low mood and mild background anxiety. Just kind of kills my day. Started to lose hope and sink back in to the stinkin' thinkin'. Made my wife upset with all my negativity and overall grouchiness. Made up some dinner... turkey burgers and stewed tomatoes with okra. Still feeling fairly nauseated off and on through the day. Feels like I could use a good cry, but am unable to. I'm not sure if that's good or bad. Good as in the weepiness is gone, but bad in that I cannot just get it all out in one shot. I usually feel a bit better after a good cry.

Day 42... 6 weeks today and the blip continues. I know I shouldn't have expected to feel perfect at this point, but damn if I'm not losing hope. I woke up this morning early again and had a restless, agitated sleep through until the alarm went off. I hugged my wife good and hard and she reminded me that this too shall pass, though it feels like it'll be forever when you're in the midst of it all. Again no panic. Just underwhelming sense of background anxiety and low mood. The low mood is harder to deal with, to be quite honest. I'm debating on how long I sould deal with how I'm feeling before it becomes a concern.

MrsCav, the potluck we had on Friday, as we use the term, is a party or gathering in which each attendee brings a dish of their own to share. Someone usually steps in for appetizer, entree, dessert, decorations or utensils (plates, forks, napkins). I usually enjoy them, but just couldn't get into it on Friday. Here's hoping for better days.