Hello everyone,

I am new to this forum but have read some of the messages and it looks like a supportive place. Sorry to start off with a question and asking advice but I'd be really interested to know from other people who have overcome similar issues.

To cut a long story short...several years ago I had very bad panic attacks relating to other stuff going on in my life. Over time I got better and life got more or less back to normal. I had a good job etc. However about ten years later (four years ago) I had a couple of big life changes at once. I moved house to a new area and also two years later started training for a new career. I had a few bad panic attacks again. And slowly I started avoiding going away outside of my home town and avoided lots of things. And I stopped using public transport in my home town beyond about a mile. I cycled everywhere - up to about 10 miles - so I could get home if I needed to. I was lucky in that I never became housebound and was fine within a three mile radius without a bike.

Anyway I got some help and over the last year have slowly started to get better more or less doing exposure therapy. It's been slow but steady. I can now get the bus into town without any anxiety and I also have taken three out of town trips - one was 50 miles away. One was even an overnight stay. It's taken me about a year of really working at it to get to this stage.

However, the problem is this. I'm trying to accelerate the next bit of getting better. This is because in a couple of weeks time I am supposed to be going away - about 250 miles from where I live to a conference related to my new career. And I'm supposed to be giving a paper which I am also nervous about. It's going to mean getting on a train which I haven't done for about three years now. And obviously it is a train going a long way. It will also mean staying overnight in the other city. Today I tried to make a train journey of about 40 miles. I got on the train but then got off again and didn't go anywhere. I feel like I am trying to force the next stage and it's making me very anxious. I'm not sure I can get where I need to in the next two weeks.

To those people who have slowly managed to get better - did you find that the incremental stages got bigger each time or does it seem as though I am trying to do too much too soon.

If anyone has any thoughts I'd be keen to hear. Thanks in advance.