this is going to be a pretty sour post... I just have that over whelming feeling once again of having no where to run to and just feeling really trapped. My health anxiety has literally been driving me insane for the past month.. this is worst its ever been. I am OBSESSED with my heart rate... If its too low (past 70) or if its too high (past 90), I flip out. I seem to be trying to control it.. if that makes any sense.. and its literally the most insane train of thoughts i have ever had. It has caused me SO much distress.. Every day I am walking around thinking "today is the day I will die". I know it sounds very over dramatic but this is how bad i've let it get to. I am literally terrorizing myself. ... It's complete insanity. I've even let it get to the point where I am thinking of committing suicide because I want to be in control of my death. Ofcourse I realize just how bad that is... I just can't stop these intrusive thoughts! :(

Anyway... Sorry I just had to let it out for a moment.. Even if brief on an online forum...

Any words of wisdom? or tips on how to be with those intrusive thoughts, bad habits? how to not let them get to you so much?

Thanks in advance :( I really appreciate anything

- Emily