I feel like I pretty much know how to calm myself down from panic (not that it always works) but sometimes I just don’t have the energy.
This morning my anxiety was bad, but not so bad that it warranted me working from home instead of the office like I do sometimes. But I really nearly didn’t come in because, although I knew that I’d be able to reduce my anxiety once I was at work, I just thought “I just don’t have the energy to do it, I don’t want to spend another morning struggling and even though I know I’ll be fine in the end I’m just too tired to do it again”.
It’s so frustrating because it feels like whenever I make progress (I went to two meetings at work yesterday which I normally struggle with, and one of them ended up being 3 times longer than originally planned) it just feels like it doesn’t make any difference. I know that it’s a slow process and I’m not expecting to have one good day and then never experience anxiety again but sometimes it feels like I do things that are really hard and make me really anxious because I know that that is better than avoiding them, and it just doesn’t make any difference. So I end up thinking, why should I struggle and feel anxious today, when it doesn’t feel like I get any benefit out of it in the long run.
Does anyone else struggle with this sort of thing, lacking energy and positivity about trying to do things which you know you should?