Quote Originally Posted by Mindprison View Post
I do think that we need to be a bit tougher on the reassurance seeking if it's becoming a regular occurrence from a poster.

However, I won't disagree that it's been taking a lot less for things to get heated, so to speak. There is a very fine line between being hard for the greater good and just being malicious.

As Axolotl says we've become hardened and it's making us look like we're doing it for the fun of it when we're actually trying to help in what feels like the only avenue left to us.

It's all well and good saying that we need to be tougher because it's better than the alternative (keeping the anxiety cycle going) but part of me doesn't even know if we can go back now and wondering if we shouldn't have let it go this far to begin with.

The health anxiety is the most frequented board on the forum because reassurance has been easily accessible there for a long time. But...where do we go from here? If we try to be tougher, one half will say it's cruel. If we continue to give constant reassurance, the other half will say it's cruel.

I once saw a thread descend into complete chaos, members fighting each other over who was right and who was wrong when it came to how to deal with the reassurance cycle that was obviously happening. While the original poster disappeared for months while everyone fought among themselves, only for the poster to come back with a completely different problem after everyone had completely burned themselves out on each other.

I don't know if it's even possible, but some kind of unity about this issue is needed between everyone before we'll get anywhere.
There will never be agreement on a combined strategy as long as a) it's left to members to determine the strategy and b) we don't all share the same beliefs. We just end up back in the blunt vs. feeding argument (one based on often biased binary views rather than a spectrum).

For a combined strategy, it has to come from Admin. But look at how people have constantly ignored Admin's appeals? It has calmed down at the moment but I don't expect it to last as it hasn't in the years I've been a member.

You don't have to get tough to challenge. I don't believe therapists would talk to people how some on here have under the guise of being blunt. It would be unprofessional. But they don't need to as they can challenge whilst staying dispassionate therefore not getting frustrated. They would burn out very quickly if they got too emotionally involved.

But we are talking about people here too. Different beliefs. Isn't it like differing parenting styles?

So, there needs to be clearer definition of what it tough and what is not veering into reassurance. Some go too far either way in my opinion.

Then it comes down to whether we accept what Admin state has to be the way forward. If you don't, it will be down to Admin to enforce the t&cs.